


Vigilante

by CoffeeDevil



Series: Heroes and Spies [1]
Category: Kuroshitsuji | Black Butler
Genre: Action, Action/Adventure, Adventure, Alternate Universe - Spies & Secret Agents, Alternate Universe - Superheroes/Superpowers, M/M, Spies & Secret Agents, Spy - Freeform, Superheroes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-24
Updated: 2016-10-03
Packaged: 2018-08-10 19:29:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 7
Words: 40,876
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7858156
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CoffeeDevil/pseuds/CoffeeDevil
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In a world where superheroes are the norm, deep-cover British intelligence agent Ciel Phantomhive struggles to do his job while contending with his city's resident "hero," the Demon Crow. And what's up with his weird new roommate, anyway?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This light, fast, fun story is brought to you by dozens of writing prompts and entirely too much caffeine. It is not to be taken seriously at all. The majority is told from Ciel's perspective, so all the characters are colored though his perceptions. Enjoy!

"You can't _leave_ ," Ciel pleaded, widening his big blue eyes into a guilt-inducing puppy dog stare. "Please, Finny? You're the best roommate ever." And he really was. He was quiet and tidy and had a schedule completely opposite of Ciel's so they barely ever saw each other.

Finny kept his guilty eyes locked onto the kitchen floor. "I'm sorry, Ciel, but I've got to."

Ciel sputtered the first thing he could think of: "But – rent's due in two days!"

Finny grimaced, shuffling his feet over the white linoleum. "I'll give you the money, but I can't stay. It's an emergency. My family needs me to come home immediately." The blond boy looked so miserable that Ciel felt bad for trying to pressure him.

Sighing, Ciel threw up a hand in defeat. "You gotta do what you gotta do," he drawled in a strong Texas accent. "I hope everything works out with your family."

Finny smiled brightly, glad Ciel wasn't mad. "Thanks!" he said, instantly back to his default state of Annoyingly Cheerful. "I should have all my stuff out by the middle of tomorrow morning if you want to show it to potential roommates. Hopefully you'll get one fast."

Ciel groaned internally at the thought of trying to find someone else to live with. Someone who wouldn't snoop through his stuff, wonder about his odd hours, or ask a bunch of questions. The subject of Ciel Phantomhive was a closely guarded secret, thank you very much; busybodies need not apply.

He didn't say much to Finny after that, simply sat back and watched in disapproval as the other boy packed up his meager possessions and stacked the few boxes by the door. In the mood to whine, he flipped through his contacts until he settled on the one most likely to listen. "Hey, Elizabeth," he drawled when she picked up.

" _Ciel!_ " she chirped brightly. " _What's up?_ "

"Wanna move in with me?"

" _So soon? But baby, we haven't even kissed yet_."

"Ew. No."

" _That's not very nice!_ "

"Neither is the thought of kissing you. I just need a roommate because Finny's moving out."

" _Oh, no! I liked him. What'd you do this time?_ "

Ciel huffed indignantly. "I'll have you know that this one wasn't my fault! He has family drama he needs to take care of."

" _That's a first. Normally they run screaming when you threaten to make them disappear._ "

"If you're talking about Redmond, that was one time and he deserved it for desecrating my tea."

" _And Pluto?_ "

"He knows what he did."

" _Ciel –"_

"I get it. I'm hard to live with. Blah, blah, blah." He flopped back on the couch, stretching out and staring at the ceiling. "Is it too much to ask for someone who pays rent, shuts the hell up, and never looks at me?"

" _Um, yes. Normal people like making friends and think its creepy when you don't._ "

"I have friends! You're my friend," he wheedled sweetly.

" _Not gonna work. I'm your co-worker and you know it._ "

"Bah. What's on the menu for tonight?" he asked, changing topics.

There was a brief flurry of keystrokes. " _Nothing, you're clear._ "

"Good. I actually have to go into the office tomorrow. Eight A.M. is hard enough without an all-nighter."

" _Oh, wah, you big baby. Some of us do it every day._ "

"Sucks to be you."

She blew a raspberry in his ear and started chatting happily about her newest computer's sweet specs, sending Ciel into a deep sleep.

The phone was still pressed to his ear in the morning, giving him the adrenaline rush of a lifetime as its alarm blared directly into his ear. "GAH!" he shouted, springing up. The phone clattered to the floor and he scrambled after it, pounding the screen frantically to shut it off. Ciel stood in the living room, chest heaving like he'd run a marathon. "Damn." Shaking his head, he padded into the bathroom for a shower. Getting up early was bad enough; having the bejeezus scared out of him didn't make it any easier.

He dressed and drank his Earl Grey like a zombie, too spaced out to even turn on the TV or browse the web. He normally hated coffee but had to admit he was in dire need of it today, so Ciel shambled into the office early to filch theirs. Free and already made? Even a zombie could handle that.

He was leaning against the counter of the break room when his senses started to come back online. He had no idea how long he'd been standing there, maybe twenty minutes or so guessing from the clock across from him. Used to his eccentric behavior, the other employees ignored him, simply reaching around for what they needed and not bothering to talk to him. To them, he was the crazy IT department head that worked from home ninety-nine percent of the time and only interacted via chat windows.

There were technically ten more minutes until he needed to be in his office, so Ciel amused himself by watching the other employees scamper around. Most darted in just long enough to grab a snack or drink, not wanting to risk the ire of the floor manager, Mr. Spears, by looking unbusy for too long. Only two other people seemed to be taking their time; a redheaded man nicknamed 'Joker' whom Ciel recognized and a pale, black-haired man he did not. Both were seated at a table, talking casually.

"That's tough, man," the redhead said resting his chin on his left fist, right hand holding coffee.

The dark haired one snorted. "Tough? That's an understatement," he countered in a posh British accent. Ciel perked up at the sound. "Honestly, where am I supposed to go, a hotel?"

Joker winced. "I'd let you stay with me, but the missus's family has taken over our house and I don't know if they'll ever leave. We're bursting at the seams; it's a circus!"

The new man waved his hand dismissively. "Don't worry about it, mate. I'll work it out. There's got to be someone looking for a flatmate in this city."

"Excuse me." The word popped out of Ciel's mouth before he even realized it had left. Both men turned to look at him. He flinched. He really hadn't meant to say anything, but desperate times call for desperate measures, so he rolled with it. "I didn't mean to eavesdrop, but are you looking for a place to live?"

Curious crimson eyes met ocean blue. "I am actually," he responded in that heart-wrenchingly familiar London cadence. It took everything Ciel had not to let his own natural accent slip through in response.

"Then you're in luck," Ciel drawled, carefully cultivated Texas twang firmly in place. "My roommate just moved out and I'm looking for a replacement. If you're interested, that is."

The new man eyed him. "I'm sorry, but who are you?"

Ciel's eyebrows rose and he looked at Joker, who snickered and explained in a faux-documentary tone: "This elusive creature is the rare Ciel Phantomhive, spotted in the wild. He runs the IT department. You won't see him again for another two months unless he pops out to bite the jugular of an intern who messes with his coding," Joker supplied with a laugh. Ciel huffed, but didn't argue the point.

Looking interested, the new man nodded, stood, and extended his hand. "Sebastian Michaelis, new R and D flunky."

Ciel shifted his coffee and shook hands, looking (way) up at the giant who towered over him. "Would you like to come by and look at the apartment this afternoon, Sebastian?"

Sebastian let out a bitter little laugh. "That would be ideal. I'd like to move in today, too, if that's possible." At Ciel's surprised face, he admitted. "My last place kind of … blew up."

"And suddenly I'm not sure I want you to move in," Ciel noted, withdrawing his hand quickly.

Sebastian lifted his palms in a gesture of surrender. "It wasn't me, I swear; my friend was trying to cook dinner. I'm not even sure _how_ he managed to make an electric stove explode. I'm actually a very good cook myself," he added, trying to throw in a selling point so Ciel wouldn't retract his offer.

Ciel examined him skeptically for a minute before nodding. "Okay, I'll give you a shot. Try not to mess it up." As he turned to leave, Sebastian lurched forward, grabbing his shoulder. Ciel tensed. He loathed physical contact. His first instinct was to judo-flip that giant motherfucker across the room and teach him a lesson, but Elizabeth's voice rang in the back of his head: _Normal people like making friends and think its creepy when you don't._ So instead, Ciel just paused and turned, plastering what he believed was a friendly smile on his face. "Yes?"

"I don't have your number," Sebastian reminded him with a hint of teasing.

Ciel nodded, preparing to leave again. "I'll text it to you."

"But you don't have _my_ number," Sebastian pointed out mockingly, openly smirking at him now.

Ciel's grin widened into a true smile and gained a vicious edge. Planning to wipe that smirk off Sebastian's face, he responded, "I'm IT. We have everything." With that, he shrugged off Sebastian's hand and left, popping his in earbuds and pulling up the building's security feed on his phone as he walked.

 _"–strange fellow,"_ Sebastian was remarking as Ciel found the proper feed.

_Joker laughed. "Yep, but that's common knowledge, my friend. I keep forgetting how new you are."_

_"So he's always like that?"_

_"More or less. That's actually the most social I've ever seen him; he must like you."_

Ciel scoffed and rolled his eyes at that as he entered his office. He plopped down at his desk and punched up Sebastian's file in the system, hunting for his cell number.

 _"He is very attractive,"_ Sebastian noted, making Ciel's eyes widen. Well. Wasn't this conversation getting interesting? He briefly debated letting it go on, but thought it would be way more fun to embarrass Sebastian. Ciel quickly typed up **"You're not bad looking yourself. ;)"** and texted Sebastian's phone. Ciel flicked the video feed from the breakroom up onto his big monitor, getting a nice view of Sebastian's face blanching as he read the text. His mouth fell open and he stared at it in horrified silence before looking around for cameras. Joker leaned over to see and chuckled out a soft, _"Yeah, he does that."_

 **"Ciel?"** Sebastian texted back, making Ciel roll his eyes. He wrote and erased several sarcastic responses before settling on, **"Yes. Meet me in my office (201) when you're done for the day. And try to keep it in your pants, Romeo."** Ciel watched Sebastian's cheeks turn a deep pink as he responded, **"Ok. Sorry."**

Ciel snickered. _Who's smirking now, asshole?_ Hopefully this would teach Sebastian to keep Ciel at arm's length, making everything a bit easier if he moved in. Pleased at the thought, Ciel settled down to work.  

\---

"And that's really it," Ciel concluded. He had just given Sebastian a walk-though of the apartment, not that there was much to walk though. The main space was an open kitchen/dining/living space with the bedrooms doors off on opposite sides. Ciel's had an attached bath inside his room; the other bedroom was right next to the hall bath.

Sebastian nodded along as Ciel explained about rent and parking. "Any rules I should know about?"

"As far as the apartment goes: no pets, no smoking, no loud noises after midnight. If you make a hole in the wall, fill it when you leave. As for you and me personally: I stay out of your room, you stay out of mine. I would prefer you not to have lots of people over all the time, but as long as they're not disturbing me, I won't kick up a fuss. I do work from home a lot, so there will be times the apartment needs to be quiet." _My real work is at night, so there will be times you need to shut the hell up so I can sleep all day_ , he mentally corrected. "I'll put a note on my door if that's the case."

Sebastian nodded again. "That's fair enough. I work nine-to-five most days so I won't be here to bother you. I do have one question, though." Ciel inclined his head and waited. "Where is your coffee pot?"

The ashy-haired male lifted a brow. "I thought all you Brits drank tea?"

"And I thought all you Texans drank coffee," the ebony-haired man retorted.

Ciel lifted a hand to concede the point. "I don't have one, but you're welcome to get one and keep it in the kitchen. You're also welcome to put as much of your stuff out here in the shared space as you want. You'll be living here too."

Sebastian hefted the black nylon duffle bag he had carried in with him. "You're looking at it."

"Everything you own is in that bag?" Ciel asked disbelievingly.

"Indeed." He laughed self-deprecatingly as he looked at the pathetically small bag. "Everything that's not a pile of ash, anyway."

Ciel felt a rare twinge of pity. "If you need anything, let me know. There's some food in the fridge if you want it."

"So, does that mean I can stay?" the taller man asked playfully with a hopeful smile.

"As long as you pay rent and don't piss me off." Ciel hoped Sebastian wouldn't always try to tease him. It would get old fast.

"I will do my very best."

"Tch," Ciel responded. As far as he was concerned, he had met his People-Time Quota for the day and was now done interacting. "Go settle in or whatever you want to do. I'll be in my room." _Not that I'll come out if you need help; that's just where I'll be._ Sebastian said something, probably polite, at his back but Ciel didn't bother listening. He closed himself safely in his room and fell face-first onto the bed. "I missed you," he mumbled into a pillow. "People are exhausting. You're the only one who understands me." Monthly department meetings were one of the few things that dragged him into the office and made him pretend to be sociable. The others refused to let him participate via video chat so he was forced to come in in person at unreasonable hours and work all day in the office like a drone. Blerg.

He had just started drifting off when his butt vibrated.

"No-o-o," he groaned. Ciel nudged the phone out of his pocket and cracked an eye, secretly hoping it was the office so he could shunt it to voice mail and deal with it later. No such luck. "Lizzy," he stated flatly.

 _"Hello to you, too, Sunshine,"_ she said sweetly. _"Did the big, bad office make you pouty again?"_

"Meh."

She giggled into the phone. _"I know something that will put a pep in your step..."_ she taunted.

Perking up, he opened both eyes, rolled over, and sat up. "What are we doing?"

_"How do you feel about a little B and E?"_

"Um, like it's the greatest idea ever? What are we after?" Ciel was smiling now, one foot bouncing happily.

 _"H.Q. needs some files that are only stored in hardcopy. Ugh. I hate when people are smart about things,"_ Lizzy grumbled, wishing everything could be digital and easily hacked.

"I don't; this is what I live for!"

 _"And don't we all know it, you little adrenaline junky,"_ she responded with friendly exasperation. _"Meet up is Drop Point Two at eleven. We'll brief you there."_

"Yeah, yeah, I know the drill." Ciel hung up without a goodbye, already looking forward to tonight. Suddenly too energetic to sit still, he bounced into the kitchen to rustle up a candy bar, stopping dead in his tracks when he saw Sebastian in there. Shit. Ciel was so used to never seeing Finny that he'd forgotten what it was like to have a roommate who was actually home.

"Oh, hello again," Sebastian said pleasantly, stirring something on the stove.

"Uh, hi." Ciel walked around him casually. He grabbed his last Double Decker bar out of the pantry and made a mental note to order more.

"What do you have there?" Sebastian asked as Ciel walked back by, heading to his room. Ciel tensed, not really in the mood for conversation. The best he could do was hold up the candy bar and hope his face looked friendly. "Huh. I've never had one of those. Are they any good?"

Ciel couldn't help the expression of absolute disbelief that slapped itself across his face. "You've never had a Double Decker?" He said it in the same tone as one would ask _"You've never been outside?"_

"Should I have?" Sebastian asked, thoroughly confused as to why it was such a big deal.

"I just assumed you would have since you're, you know, from London?"

A strange expression flickered through Sebastian's eyes before he shrugged. "I'm not much of a candy-eater."

Ciel wavered. He wanted to be alone, but he also had a civic duty to ensure every Londoner had at least _tried_ the glory that is the Double Decker bar. Resigned to do queen and country proud, he pulled off a small piece and extended it. "Here."

Brows lifted in surprise, Sebastian took the tiny bite and placed it in his mouth. From what he had been told, Ciel didn't reach out often and he didn't want to rebuff this rare gesture of friendship. "That is good," he noted. "Thank you."

Duty done, Ciel nodded and retreated to his room. He sat happily on the edge of his bed, swinging his feet and planning his night. It was a Monday and Sebastian had to work in the morning, so there was a good chance he would be in his own room when Ciel headed out at ten-thirty. If not, Ciel needed an excuse for leaving so late. Late night grocery run, maybe? He sucked on a mouthful of chocolate as he considered, letting it melt on his tongue. He obviously couldn't wear his costume out but carrying it out in a bag could get suspicious, too, especially if Sebastian caught him doing it multiple times. For that matter, he couldn't always say he was getting groceries in the middle of the night. No, he needed something that would be a constant excuse.

Pulling his phone out, he shot a text to Lizzy: **Is my old outfit still at Home Base?**

A few seconds later, Lizzy responded: **Yeah. Why?**

Ciel: **I need someone to bring it to DP2.**  
Lizzy: **K. What happened to your other one?**  
Ciel: **I have it, but I can't sneak it out past my new roommate.**  
Lizzy: **Put it on under your clothes like Superman. ;)**  
Ciel: **It's bulky and would look suspicious AF.**  
Lizzy: **:( Fine.**  
Lizzy: **Try not to be a douche to your new roomie.**  
Ciel: **I've been perfectly friendly, tyvm.  
** Lizzy: **I'll believe it when I see it. You have yet to make one last 6 months.**

Ciel rolled his eyes at the phone, not bothering to respond further. Suit needed, point made, conversation over. Honestly, why did people talk so much?

Polite knocking interrupted his brooding. "Ciel? I made chili if you want some," Sebastian called through the door.

 _Speaking of unnecessary conversation,_ Ciel groaned internally. He glanced at his clock, which displayed a depressingly early time of 7:42 PM. There were almost three hours until he needed to leave, which was way too long to hide in his room and he would need to eat anyway. Determined to prove Lizzy wrong, he mustered up a polite expression and opened his door. "That sounds great, Sebastian. Thanks." He followed Sebastian to the kitchen where the taller man scooped out two bowls and handed one to Ciel, whose stomach promptly rumbled despite having just eaten a candy bar. Traitor. "It smells good," he said politely. Sebastian nodded and followed him to the table, smiling as Ciel dug in with gusto. "It _is_ good!" He said with shock. "You really made this? It's not from a jar?"

Sebastian laughed. "I told you I can cook. I even made it with the food in your pantry. I hope that's okay?"

Ciel bobbed his head, swallowing another mouthful. "I didn't know I had the stuff in there." _Hell, I don't even know what goes in chili_ , he thought to himself, secretly impressed. He had planned to slap together a bland meatloaf or some plain burger patties himself, but had to admit this was better. Maybe Sebastian wouldn't completely suck after all.

Said non-sucky roommate got even better when he announced, "I don't want you to think I'm avoiding you, but I normally go to bed early because I'm an early riser. So I'm sorry if we don't see each other much."

An angelic choir played in Ciel's head. Sweet baby Jesus, this annoying giant might actually work out. "That's cool. My last roommate was a college student who worked nights. We never saw each other at all, so I'm used to being alone here."

A knock on the door made both men look up. "That's probably Bard," Sebastian explained before Ciel could ask. He rose and opened it to reveal a burly tanned man with blond hair. He had a wrinkled white long sleeved shirt rolled up to his elbows and an unlit cigarette between his teeth. In his hands was a brand new coffee pot, still in the box. "Hey ya," he greeted Sebastian.

"Bard," Sebastian nodded, gesturing him in.

The man named Bard looked around, nodding in approval. "Nice place." Catching sight of Ciel at the table, he called, "Hey, kid."

Ciel's eyebrow twitched. "Hello."

"This way," Sebastian interjected, leading him into the kitchen. "Let's set it up over here." The two men bustled around in the kitchen, opening boxes, crinkling plastic, and fitting things together. Ciel had a clear view from his spot at the table, watching with interest as an obnoxiously large and complicated machine was assembled. "Over in that corner, I think," Sebastian muttered, lifting an elbow to an empty space on the counter. He looked back at Ciel. "Is this okay?"

Ciel took a few steps closer to see what he was talking about. "Yeah, it's fine there."

"Cool," Bard said. "What's your name, little man?"

Biting the inside of his cheek, Ciel responded, "Ciel Phantomhive."

Green eyes widening, he looked between Sebastian and Ciel. "Oh, so _you're_ the new roomie, eh? Nice to meet you, I'm Baldroy, but everyone calls me Bard."

Ciel really didn't want to know who Bard thought he was when he was calling him 'kid,' so he just nodded and reached over the counter to place his bowl in the sink.

"Thank you for the new machine," Sebastian said gratefully. "I don't know how I would be able to function tomorrow without it."

Bard clapped him on the shoulder. "It was the least I could do. I really am sorry about yesterday."

Sebastian waved him off. "I'm just glad you made it out of the fire okay."

"Technically it wasn't on fire."

Sebastian rolled his eyes. "Of course it wasn't on fire. You blew it up!"

Bard looked like he wanted to argue, but couldn't come up with a rebuttal. He lifted his arms in a _What can you do?_ gesture and shrugged. "Yeah, I guess. I'll let you know when the renter's insurance comes through."

Ciel faded into the background as the two friends talked, taking the chance to escape to his room. At least these two guys were interesting. He previous roommates had all been so … vapid, constantly chattering about women and TV shows much the same way Lizzy babbled on about shoes. He locked his door and dug around under his bed, gathering the bits and tools he thought his backup suit might need. Honestly, he didn't expect tonight's mission to take long. Lizzy would have mentioned if she expected trouble, so this was probably the most boring, basic kind of B&E. It was still better than that crappy desk job he had to suffer through for cover, though. Yeah, he did get a nice paycheck for it, but it was really just an elaborate ruse. Hell, half the time he didn't even do the work himself, just foisted it off on his team while he played super spy. He probably should feel guilty about that, but it always got done so what does it matter who did it?

Ciel filled the next few hours with mindless web surfing. Around 9:30 Sebastian called goodnight and Ciel listened to him putter around between bedroom and bath for a bit before closing his bedroom door for good. Excellent. No need for stupid excuses. He gathered up the few tools he'd pulled out earlier and stuffed them into his pockets, heading out a bit early.

Drop Point Two was an old abandoned department store on the edge of downtown. Ciel's team never discussed locations or missions over the phone and always met up in person in predetermined locations they knew were clean to talk. It may be overkill, but no one had ever gotten the drop on The Queen's Watchdog, and they were determined to keep it that way.

"It's Phantom, says the security feed," a soft, familiar called as Ciel exited the stairway into the upper storage level.

"Hello, Snake," Ciel said, falling back into his natural London accent. It felt good to speak freely without worrying about pronunciation. He followed the other man's voice to the center of the large space. "Did you bring my suit?"

The young albino man nudged the bag at his feet. "Yes, I've got it here, just as Saber said to."

Ciel's lip quirked. "Is she still making you call her that?"

"Elizabeth cuts through firewalls like a saber. It's only fair she gets a code name too, she said," Snake explained. His white ponytail shone in the dim light as he nodded.

Ciel chuckled. "If you say so. I'm not going along with it." He hastily stripped off everything but his underwear and slid into the lightly padded and armored suit. It wouldn't stop a bullet (well, it might if they were considerate enough to shoot him in the dead center of his chest), but it would soften blows and protect him from cuts. Honestly, in the three years he'd been doing this, he could count the number of fistfights he'd been in on one hand. They normally planned these things out so he _wouldn't_ attract attention and there were rarely more than one or two security guards, which he could easily incapacitate from a distance. He was hardly ever spotted and never caught, thus his code name: Phantom.

Properly dressed, Ciel adjusted his slim utility belt, checking and rechecking his tools to make sure they were all present and functional. His suit and full-face helmet covered him in a layer of dark gray, blotting out his pasty skin for easy nighttime sleuthing.

"Saber needs the secret customer registrar from Chamber's Inc. She says our employer suspects they are participating in human trafficking but everything dead ends there because nothing is digital."

Ciel nodded, expression grim. He'd normally give props to anyone smart enough to hide their illicit activity so well, but human trafficking was nasty stuff. Shuffling money around skillfully, he could admire; slave traffic, not so much. "Where are the files are located?"

Snake shuffled uncomfortably, "Well … Saber doesn't know, exactly. She's not sure they even exist because they're not digital, but if they did, they'd likely be in a locked filing cabinet somewhere."

Ciel rolled his eyes. "Great. I guess I'll just search the whole damn building, then."

" _I can hear you, you know,_ " Elizabeth's tinny voice sounded from the comm in his helmet.

"Good. Guess that means you know I'm searching the whole building for something that may or may not even exist, then. I'll see you next week."

" _Oh, wah. Just check the offices on the top floor. It'll probably be in one of the bosses' rooms, you big baby. Stop whining._ "

"Whining is my hobby. Don't take it away from me." He gave himself a final pat-down and tossed a thumbs up at Snake before climbing the corner staircase up to the roof. "Besides, you get all nervous when I stop talking."

" _Yeah, because it's suspicious._ "

Ciel could see the shiny white Chamber's Inc. building from his rooftop. He took a few steps back and made a running leap across the narrow ally way between his building and the next. He rolled as he landed, springing to his feet and repeating the process twice more before he was next to his target. The tall, sparkly behemoth shot up high into the sky, glass and white concrete lit all over with spotlights. Ciel located a shadowy area below where two spotlights overlapped and shot a zip line into the concrete, wrapping the loose end securely around a brick outcropping. He tugged on the line a few times to make sure it was secure before clipping himself on. "Going in," he muttered into his helmet.

The small man pushed off, flinging himself into the open air and listening to the whirr of metal sliding on cable as wind rushed by. He stuck out his feet to keep from crashing into the side of the building. With a light _thump_ , he touched down. Still hanging from the cord, he walked sideways a few steps to reach the edge of a window and affixed motorized suction cup devices around its edge. Skyscraper windows may be thick and strong and resistant to heavy blows, but they were designed to withstand pressure pushing _in_ , not pulling _out_. Smirking, Ciel clicked the remote in his hand. The four motorized devices smoothly lifted the glass with a little _pop_ , creating a 16 inch gap which was more than enough for Ciel to slide through. He unclipped himself from the line, hooking the lead onto a nearby table leg so it wouldn't slip back outside. "I'm in."

" _Good. Head to the north corner to find a staircase. There are only ten floors, so you're going to the very top_ ," Elizabeth instructed.

Ciel followed her instructions, climbing up seven flights of stairs. "Jesus," he huffed. "Next time I'm taking the elevator."

" _You know you can't_ ," Lizzy chided.

"Woman, don't ruin my daydream. I'm dying here," Ciel panted, leaning against the stairwell wall for a second to his breath. A suspicious buzzing noise flowed through the headset when he opened the door to the executive level. "Lizzy," he growled in a warning tone. "That better not be what I think it is."

" _Shit, shit, shit_ ," she muttered to herself on the other end of the line, keys clacking away. " _Everything's fine_ ~!" she trilled brightly to Ciel. " _I got it_."

Groaning internally, Ciel darted into the first office. He had tripped some sort of alarm by entering this level and might not have long before he needed to run. Since he was already here, Ciel was determined to make the most of it. The first two rooms had nothing locked or suspicious, so he popped into the third one, which was by far the largest. _Jackpot,_ he thought to himself. He tugged on all the filing cabinets, noticing with ire that they were ALL locked. Same with the desk. "Everything in this damn room is locked, Lizzy," he complained.

" _M'hm,_ " she hummed, distracted.

"Lizzy!"

" _What! I'm a little busy here. Just pick one!_ "

Ciel spared a moment to think about where he would hide his own damning evidence. Would it be close so he could protect it himself or far away so he could distance himself? He checked the cabinets farthest from the desk first, picking the locks with careful skill. They were a step up from the standard office fare, but nothing too difficult. The top two drawers were a bust. The bottom looked promising. "Hey, I think I found something. Want me to send you a picture?"

" _Uhh_ ," Lizzy squeaked high and tight, " _not right now. Just take it with you, okay? And, um, I'm really sorry, but I think you should try to finish up kinda quick, alright?_ "

"Lizzy!" Ciel stuffed the files into his backpack and threw himself as the desk, cursing when he saw how complicated the locks were. He ripped out another set of picks, fumbling in his haste.

" _WHAT!?_ " she screeched like a harpy. " _I'm doing my flippin' best over here! That sensor wasn't on the plans and I just got it turned off. Jesus! What more do you want!_ "

Ciel sprung the left bottom drawer. Booze. He rolled his eyes and scooted to the right. "Is anyone coming to check?"

There was a pause, followed by a relieved sigh. " _No. I canceled it with the security company before they dispatched an officer. It was barely a blip on the scanner. They'll probably send someone to investigate the false reading in the morning, but you're good._ "

Ciel breathed a sigh of relief. He allowed his shoulders to relax and moved his fingers at a more sedate pace, going through the right bottom drawer slowly and then the top. "Bingo!" he cried as he examined the contents of the last drawer carefully. These files looked even more suspicious than the last batch and there were a lot of them. Not wanting to waste time photographing them all, he just stuffed the lot into his bag with the others and jubilantly declared, "And I am out of here!"

A deep, rolling chuckle from across the room made his head snap up to peer over the desk. "I don't think so," an American voice rumbled. Despite the dim light, Ciel could clearly make out the black and red bodysuit of the city's own resident vigilante, the Demon Crow. His large form blocked the only exit.

"Bloody hell," Ciel grumbled, head drooping. "Not this moron."

" _Phantom? What is it_?"

"Nothing, I've got it," he said softly, standing and revealing himself to the other man.

"Ah, so we meet again Watchdog," the Crow announced dramatically, hands on his hips in a classic Superman pose. His cloth mask covered his face entirely, but Ciel could hear the smile in his voice. "Corporate espionage? This hardly seems like your style."

"God, what is _wrong_ with you? Ciel demanded, disgusted as always by his opponent's over-the-top theatrics. He held the strap to his small backpack in his hand. Putting it on would give this moron something to grab onto if they grappled, so he left it loose, intending to use it as a weapon if necessary – which it probably would be. That handful of fistfights he'd gotten into? All with this loser. The best Ciel could tell, he was some nutjob who watched way too many superhero movies and woke up one day deciding he wanted to be one. Unlike other cities' heroes, he had no superpowers (thank god) but Ciel had to admit the Crow was surprisingly effective against thugs and petty criminals. However, he was an untrained amateur and thus stood no chance against an experienced intelligence agent.

The Demon Crow _tsked_ , waggling his finger at Ciel like a naughty child. "I'm not the one who got caught stealing. Now, hand it over and I'll go easy on you." Ciel hung his head in exasperation, which must have looked like defeat to the dope across the room. The Crow took a few steps forward, hand extended. "A wise decision. It's never too late to renounce your criminal ways."

Ciel was tempted to point out that _he_ had broken in too and had no right to be there either, but didn't waste his breath. Instead, he shuffled a few steps forward with his head hung low, slumping his small form to look even smaller. The Crow stood proudly, feet spread wide with one hand on his hip and the other graciously extended as if to lift Ciel from the bowels of criminal misconduct.

Sucker.

Ciel swung the bag up, hitting him hard between the legs. As the Crow doubled over with a grunt, Ciel kicked him hard in the side, toppling him down. _Timber_ , Ciel thought smugly, darting around the prone form. A flailing foot caught his ankle, tugging him down too.

"Not. So fast," the Crow wheezed from flat on his back.

 _Fuck this stupid motherfucker!_ Ciel raged inside, scrambling to his feet. The last thing he wanted was to be caught wrestling on the floor with someone twice his size because of a lucky hit. Thick, gloved fingers grabbed his calf and he knocked them off, aiming a brutal kick at the red **DC** on the moron's chest. "Let _go_ of me!" he shouted, pulling out of reach. He was off like a shot, flying across the office and down the stairs. "Saber!" he shouted, not wanting to risk the Crow hearing Lizzy's name. "Did you cut the building's alarms? Can I go out the front?"

"No!" she shouted back quickly. "And it's locked anyway."

"Fine," he panted, throwing himself through the third floor door where he came in. It crashed back open almost immediately after he heard it close, but he didn't stop to look. He was almost at the open window when 240 pounds of something huge and stupid tackled him.

"I got'cha now!" an excited voice shouted in his ear.

"Shut _up!_ " Ciel shrieked, voice cracking high with his rage. He flailed ineffectively, firmly pinned.

The body over his pulled back unexpectedly at his squeak. "You're a girl!?" the Demon Crow gasped, horrified that he'd been so rough with a female.

Rather than correct him, Ciel used this momentary distraction to wiggle free. He ripped the clip off the desk leg and slapped it onto his belt, throwing himself out the window only to be dragged back by the backpack in his left hand.

"Hey, you can't get away that easily, little lady!" the Crow shouted, pulling him back through the gap. There wasn't enough room to kick or hit so Ciel did the only thing he could: he dropped the backpack and flung himself back out, hitting the auto-feed so the zip line would pull him back across the street.

"Damnit, damnit, damnit!" he shouted into his mic. "He got the files."

" _Are you okay?_ "

Ciel unclipped himself and untied the cable to make sure Tall, Dark, and Dumb didn't try to Tarzan across after him. He paused to check himself over before answering. "Nothing too bad." His hip stung from his first fall and his ribs felt bruised from the tackle, but thankfully the Demon Crow hadn't landed any hits this time. Ciel wanted to go home and pass out but needed to leave this suit with his team. "I'm coming back to D. P. Two, but I think we can safely call this one a bust."


	2. Chapter 2

Ciel cracked an eye around 10 AM the next morning and moaned. His body had tensed up overnight, turning mild soreness into an allover ache. The only thing that lured him out of bed was the thought of how nice a hot shower would feel on his aching muscles. The small man leaned against the shower wall, letting the hot water run over his back to loosen the kinks as he lightly banged his forehead against the white tiles.

_Damn that stupid oaf. We'll never get those files now that they know we're looking. He ruined everything._

Too tired to keep up his self-flagellation, Ciel spun around to let the water work its magic on his front half. H.Q. would come up with something; they always did. His job was retrieval, not planning, so he resolved not to let the strategic difficulties bother him. The Demon Crow, on the other hand, was his problem and he could worry about it all he wanted. Ciel scowled. The man was a menace. He could respect law enforcement and government agents, but a nutjob in spandex? Not so much. ( _Mine's not spandex_ , he thought to himself, mentally sticking out his tongue. _And I_ am _a government agent, so there._ )

The water started to cool and Ciel switched it off before it got cold. He threw on some sweat pants and an old tee, determined to be as comfortable as possible today. He'd earned it. Barefoot, he padded into the kitchen and made himself a cup of Earl Grey. After a brief rustle through the kitchen, Ciel declared chocolate ice cream to be the breakfast of champions and dragged the pint with him to the sofa.

Sebastian arrived home just after 6:00 to find Ciel curled up on the couch with his laptop, an old sci-fi flick playing on the TV, candy wrappers scattered around him. "I see why you work from home so much," he said with a smile. "That definitely beats the office." Ciel flicked his eyes up long enough to grunt _uh-huh_ before turning back to his computer. Sebastian shrugged, placed some groceries in the kitchen, pulled his tie off, and headed into his room to change. A few minutes later he reemerged in his own sweats and sat down on the end of the sofa opposite Ciel. "So, what's on?"

"Series eighteen. Tom Baker," the ashy head mumbled, not looking up. He typed quickly, never pausing in his rush to finish the work he should have actually been doing today instead of dicking off.

Sebastian tilted his head looking between the young man and the screen curiously. _Was that some kind of answer?_ he wondered. Crimson eyes locked on the screen, he tried to decipher what was happening in the show. It looked like it was from the eighties. His brow furrowed as he concentrated.

The typing stopped suddenly and Ciel stared at him intently. "Are you sure you're British?"

"W-what?" Sebastian stuttered, looking at him with owlishly large eyes.

"I'm just saying, you've never had a Double Decker bar and you don't know what Doctor Who is. I'm beginning to wonder if your citizenship got revoked." With that, he turned back to his laptop and resumed typing.

"Was that … a joke?" Sebastian asked tentatively. Ciel arched a brow and harrumphed, making Sebastian smile widely. "It _was_ a joke, wasn't it? I didn't know you had it in you!"

"I bet there's a lot _you_ don't know," Ciel grumbled, making Sebastian snicker.

"I was planning to make spaghetti tonight. Is that alright?" Ciel nodded, eyes glued to his screen. Sebastian stood and wandered into the kitchen area. "And I _do_ know what Doctor Who is, thank you very much. I've just never watched the old ones," he called across the open space.

"Imitation Brit," Ciel groused quietly.

Sebastian laughed merrily, not put off in the least. "There's more to a country than _one_ candy bar and _one_ television show, you know."

"Yeah, like tea."

Eyes twinkling as he chopped various vegetables, Sebastian asked, "What makes you such an expert on British culture, hm?"

Ciel turned away to look at the screen, showing only a sliver of his profile to the man in the kitchen. "I read things," he answered haughtily.

"Oh, I see," Sebastian nodded, pretending to be impressed. "You must have a pretty firm grasp on foreigners, then. Likewise, I am fairly knowledgeable about your people from my own reading." Ciel looked at him inquisitively. "Americans are a very loud, rambunctious, gregarious people who are all overweight and lazy with an extreme coffee obsession. I hate to say it, but I am pretty sure this means you're an imitation Yankee," he noted sadly.

Ciel snorted, turning back to his computer. A few more clicks and he was done! He slapped the laptop closed and pushed it onto the coffee table, dislodging some candy wrappers. Sitting up straight, he clasped his hands over his head and stretched, hearing vertebrae pop. His damn hip still hurt, but the ribs were feeling better. Smiling, he scooped up all the little wrappers he could find and dumped them into the kitchen bin, pausing to peer around Sebastian's shoulder at the pot on the stove. "That's salsa," he noted flatly, staring at the chunks of tomato and onion dotted with flecks of green herbs.

Sebastian chuckled. "Not quite. In about forty minutes, it will be spaghetti sauce." Ciel simply stared at him inscrutably before wandering off. Sebastian thought the quiet little man was adorable, but could see how Joker and the others might be put off by his lack of communication. He wasn't unfriendly, though, just … shy.

Lizzy, however, would use a different word to describe him: " _Misanthrope_."

"Am not," Ciel countered childishly, spread-eagled on his bed, one hand holding the phone to his ear. "I just don't wanna go out," he drawled in case his voice carried through the walls.

" _Because you hate people_."

"What's to like?" He snorted softly, adding, "I got knocked around yesterday. Let me suffer in peace, woman."

Lizzy made a sympathetic noise. " _You said you were fine, though_."

"Must have been the adrenaline talking; my body says otherwise now. That stupid lunk is heavy."

" _More like_ hunk _,_ " she emphasized dreamily.

Ciel shot up, the sudden movement making himself wince. "Lizzy!"

" _Wha-a-a-t?_ " she whined. " _I've seen pictures of him and that body is_ fine. _Spandex hides_ nothing."

"Betrayed by my own team," Ciel lamented, flopping back down.

" _Please. You know you're the only one for me. I just want to play with him a bit._ "

"Ew. I don't even want to think about that. You and Snake have fun, I'm gonna stay in tonight."

" _Boo. That's no fun. We'll just have to stop by and cheer you up!_ "

"Don't you dare. I mean it."

" _Fine, fine. Misanthrope._ "

Ciel made a rude noise and hung up. Why was he the bad guy for not wanting to go to a grungy bar full of strangers to drink overpriced booze and fend off unwanted groping? If the others had half as much sense as him, they'd see he was right. He frowned at the ceiling for a few minutes before shaking his head. If they wanted to do it, it was none of his concern. He was going to sit at home in his sweatpants and – _sniff_. _Sniff-sniff_. His mouth watered. He was going to eat whatever _that_ was. Ciel flung himself off the bed and out into the kitchen.

"Ah, perfect timing," Sebastian noted, pulling a tray of seasoned bread out of the oven. Ciel's stomach wailed a battle cry at the aroma of garlic and herbs, making the larger man laugh. "If you don't mind setting the table, we'll see how fast we can get this food in you."

Ciel didn't have to be told twice. In fact, it was almost difficult not to somersault over the counter, climb the cabinets, and snatch up the forks and plates at the speed of light like he would on a mission. Instead, he forced himself to walk sedately around, calmly gathering things.

"I won't bite," Sebastian stated, sounding a little hurt.

Ciel paused and turned back around, head tilted. "That's good?"

"You seem to be walking really far around me, like I'm a leper or something. I'm not contagious."

Ciel's eyes widened in understanding. He instinctively kept out of everyone's arms reach; it was a deeply ingrained part of his training and he didn't even realize he'd been doing it. "Sorry. Just not used to having someone else here." With that, he turned back to setting the table.

Sebastian nodded, seemingly mollified. "No problem. I bought a bottle of red if you want some? I don't know if you drink or not."

"Sure. I could use a drink." _And not at some ratty bar_ , Ciel mentally added.

Sebastian looked through the cabinets and made a disgruntled sound. "Where are the wine glasses?" Ciel pointed the one closest to the fridge and Sebastian opened the door to find generic tumblers. "These are water glasses."

Ciel shrugged. "Only if you put water in them. Put wine in them and they're wine glasses."

Sebastian chuckled. "That's not how it works."

"Maybe not in the UK."

"I'm not sure it works that way _anywhere_ ," Sebastian argued, pulling two down and filling them halfway, "but I suppose they'll have to do." Ciel didn't bother responding, already piling his plate high with food. "Are you sure you can eat all that?" Ciel's response was to stare silently at Sebastian and shove pasta into his face until his cheeks puffed out like a chipmunk. Sebastian lifted both hands in a gesture of surrender.

 _That's what I thought, asshole_ , Ciel thought smugly. He cleared his plate and wiped up the sauce dregs with his bread. "That was good," he noted, refilling his wine glass.

Sebastian grinned, eyes happy little crescents. "Thank you. I'm glad you liked it."

Ciel sipped his wine, content to sit in silence as Sebastian cleared the plates and washed the dishes. He watched as the taller man carefully placed the leftover food in little plastic containers, storing them in the fridge and scrubbing each pan clean. Thankfully, he didn't feel the need to talk while he worked. Ciel's eyes slipped closed happily as he drained glass two and considered another refill. A suspicious plastic crinkling caught Ciel's attention, though, and he tried unsuccessfully to see over the counter from his seated position.

"I don't suppose you have any room left, do you?" Sebastian asked with a hint of promise, doing _something_ just out of sight.

Ciel flopped back into his chair, frustrated at his small stature. He wanted to know what Sebastian was doing but he didn't want _Sebastian_ to know he wanted to know. The other man might mistake his curiosity for friendship and then where would they be? "It depends on why you ask," he said cautiously.

Sebastian picked up two plates and brought them to the table. "If you did, I suppose I would offer to share this delicious cake," he teased, setting down a thick slice of the most glorious devil's food Ciel had ever seen. "If not, I suppose I'll just have to eat it all myself –" Ciel practically inhaled it. Sebastian lifted a brow, slowly chewing his own. "I guess chocolate was a good choice, then?"

Ciel nodded, looking sheepish. "It's my favorite."

"Mine too," Sebastian shared amicably. "Care for another?"

Ciel groaned. He really did want another, but he wanted his suit to fit more. Reluctantly, he shook his head, offering up a polite, "It was good, though." He rolled his eyes at the way Sebastian puffed up at his words. _It's just a store-bought cake. Sheesh. What's he so happy about?_ Ciel decided against another glass of wine and took both his plate and glass into the kitchen. What sounded good right about now was a nice cup of hot tea. _Jasmine or chamomile?_ he pondered, holding one box in either hand.

_Knock-knock-knock-knock!_

Ciel looked at Sebastian, who was staring at him. "Are you –"

"Cie-e-e-e- _el_!" a feminine voice called, followed by a sing-song: "I know you're in there." Giggles.

"Oh, bloody hell," he breathed too softly for Sebastian to hear. He looked the other man square in the eye and commanded, "Do not open that door."

Sebastian gawked at him, completely bewildered. "Who is that?"

"No one. She'll go away."

"I can _hear_ you," Elizabeth sing-songed, followed by a soft _thump_ and more giggles.

Sebastian looked torn. Ciel didn't want him to open the door, but it sounded like the girl took a tumble and he wanted to check on her. Seeing him waver, Ciel stated firmly, as if scolding a dog: "No. Don't you do it, Sebastian." But he was wasting his breath. As soon as the faintest little feminine "Ow," wafted into the apartment, Sebastian was already unlocking the door. "I hate you," Ciel muttered, leaning his head on the wall next to the pantry, resigned to his fate.

Ciel heard Sebastian's rich baritone alternate with Lizzy's light soprano and Snake's soft whispers for a minute before Sebastian led Lizzy inside, gripping his arm for balance. He escorted the dainty blonde to the couch like a gentleman and settled her safely down. Snake's pale head poked in the door after, golden eyes searching for Ciel. "Ciel. I'm sorry. I didn't want to come but Lizzy said –"

Ciel flapped a hand at him. "I know what she's like. Just come in and close the door." He placed both boxes of tea back in the pantry and picked his wine glass back up, emptying the bottle into it.

"You're really hot," Lizzy was saying across the room, refusing to let go of Sebastian's hand.

The large man looked mildly uncomfortable as she started rubbing her cheek on it, but he managed to get out a polite, "Thank you." Ciel snickered. _You brought it on yourself, now suffer._ Sebastian tried unsuccessfully to extract his appendage again before asking, "Would you like some water?"

Lizzy smiled up at him with wide green eyes. "That's so sweet! I'd love some."

After finally freeing his hand, Sebastian walked past Ciel to get a water glass. "Who is she?" he whispered.

Ciel smirked into the rim of his cup. "Trouble."

"Cie-el," she called, now sprawled out comfortably in the middle of the couch, "come sit with me."

"Honestly, woman. It's been less than two hours; you can't be this far gone," Ciel sighed.

Lizzy simply giggled, slouching further down. Snake spoke up with, "Ciel underestimates Elizabeth's determination, I think."

Ciel rolled his eyes and walked over to the lone recliner, abandoning the other two to the sofa and Lizzy's wandering, drunken hands. She pouted when she saw how far away he was, but her disappointment was short-lived. She lit up like a Christmas tree when Sebastian returned with her water. " _Thank_ you!" she gripped the glass with both hands, downing it quickly and putting the cup on the coffee table so she could grab Sebastian's arm and yank him down beside her. Seeing that she was now occupied, Snake sidled up to the unoccupied end and perched on the arm, careful not to draw Lizzy's attention.

"So, you're Ciel's new flatmate, hm?" she asked, running her hands up and down his bicep.

He watched her cautiously with a hint of amusement. "Yes. I'm Sebastian. And you are?"

She grinned. "My name's Lizzy."

"It's very nice to meet you Miss Lizzy," he said pleasantly, offering her a big smile. She tittered, burying her nose in his shoulder. "How do you know Ciel?"

"We're friends," she said unhelpfully, laying her cheek on his shoulder and sighing.

"I see."

Lizzy stuck her lip out. "We invited him out but he didn't want to come. Don't you think that's so mean?"

Ciel groaned and stared at the ceiling. "It's not a crime to want to stay in."

Lizzy just sighed and collapsed against Sebastian's shoulder. "So mean. Come out with us, Ciel! You, too, cutie," she said to Sebastian.

Ciel lifted a dark gray brow, watching her pale little fingers start exploring Sebastian's broad chest as he squirmed. "Didn't you just finish drinking?"

Lizzy threw back her head, pigtails bouncing as he laughed loudly. "Are you kidding? We haven't even started! I had a few drinks before we headed out and decided we should come kidnap you! Won't this be fun?"

Ciel looked at Snake who nodded, verifying Lizzy's story. Sighing, he explained patiently, "I can't. It's Wednesday. I have to work in the morning."

"Bullshit," she said immediately, making all three males gape at her. "What? It is. We all know you work from home."

"You don't," Ciel countered, smugly. "You have to go into the office bright and early. Go home now and you won't have a hangover." She opened her mouth to argue, but he cut her off with, "You know you won't be cute with baggy red eyes and messy makeup."

Lizzy gasped. "How dare you!"

"I've been out with you before," he said, lifting a finger to point at her. "We go to a bar, you grope everyone in sight, we drag you home at two AM, and you whine all the next day about how you're too tired and miserable to do your hair or makeup for work. At least save it for the weekend."

Grinning, she clapped her hands and shouted, "Deal!"

"W-what!?" Ciel stuttered, looking between the three on the sofa.

"I'll wait until Friday and you'll come with us!"

"That is not what I said!"

"Yes it is!" she trilled happily. "This will be so much fun."

"Snake –" Ciel pleaded. The albino looked away, clearly unwilling to pick sides. "Coward," Ciel snarled. "Sebastian?"

Smirking, the bastard placed a hand over Elizabeth's on his arm and said sincerely, "It would be my honor to join you three on Friday." Ciel slumped in his chair as she squealed and chattered happily, Sebastian patiently nodding along.

Nope, Sebastian now officially sucked no matter how good his cooking was.

Elizabeth eventually petered herself out. After her third yawn, Sebastian and Snake lifted her to her feet and led her to the door. "It was a pleasure to meet you, Snake and Miss Lizzy," Sebastian said cordially, lifting her hand for a kiss and making her giggle. She threw herself into his arms and whispered in his ear, making his face flush red. "Actually …" he rumbled lowly, leaning down to whisper in her ear. Ciel fixed his gaze on the ceiling and mentally screamed to block out his hearing, not in the mood to watch two idiots flirt. Elizabeth's loud little "Oh!" broke through his mental barrier and he winced, not opening his eyes until the door closed.

"It's safe now," Sebastian rumbled from the kitchen. Ciel simply glared. "She was nice." Ciel harrumphed. "Now, now, it wasn't all that bad. She's really cute. How did you two meet?"

"Work," Ciel stated simply, not wanting to talk.

"Oh, is she at our company?"

"No."

Undeterred by his monosyllabic responses, Sebastian just nodded. "It was nice of her to invite me out with you lot. I'm looking forward to it." Ciel eyed him silently, still displeased at the larger man's lack of help. Without responding, he brought his and Lizzy's glasses to the sink and washed them out, thinking frantically.

There was only one solution.

He had two days to catch Ebola and die so he wouldn't have to go out with Lizzy.

\---

Friday dawned bright and sunny and absolutely _awful_. Nothing life-threatening had happened. No last minute emergencies presented themselves. No natural disasters shook the city. He was left completely and utterly without an excuse to get out of socializing and to make bad things worse, he even finished his day's work before noon, leaving him with nothing to do but sit and dread the coming evening.

He was making his thousandth mindless circuit of the apartment when Sebastian arrived home around six.

"Hello there! Glad it's Friday?" Sebastian asked with a smile.

Ciel regarded him blankly before responding, "No."

Chuckling, Sebastian loosened his tie and walked past Ciel into the kitchen to get a glass of water. "You're not still upset about tonight, are you?" Ciel gave him a telling look, not bothering with a verbal response. "Come on, it won't be that bad." At Ciel's skeptical face, he offered, "Look, I tell you what: We'll go out for a little bit. If you're still not feeling it after an hour, I'll pretend to get sick so you can take me home."

Ciel perked up, eyeing Sebastian with renewed interest. "You'd do that?"

"What kind of a flatmate would I be if I didn't?"

A ghost of a smile played over Ciel's lips. Lizzy would never believe it if he tried to play sick himself, but Sebastian was an unknown quantity. She wouldn't dare accuse him of lying. Relieved, Ciel met Sebastian's gaze and nodded. "Okay. Cool. Thank you." It felt like a weight had been suddenly lifted off his shoulders.

Sebastian grinned widely. "What are friends for?" He tossed back the rest of his water and said. "I'm going to change. Do you know where we're meeting up?"

Ciel shook his head. "We're not meeting; they're coming here. Elizabeth doesn't trust me to show up on my own anymore. She usually has to drag me kicking and screaming."

Sebastian snickered. "I see. Be right back."

Ciel watched him go pensively. _Friends, huh? I guess that's not so bad if he can help me deal with Elizabeth._ Shrugging, he looked down at his own clothes and sighed. He might as well change now, too, and save himself the grief of Lizzy doing it for him later. It was a bit of a challenge because he never really put much effort into his appearance. At the office, he wore suits; at home, he wore sweats. Anything in between was a mystery. Declaring his own efforts a bust, he pulled on the last outfit Lizzy had dressed him in: a black tee and black skinny jeans with a collared shirt in varying shades of blue left open over it. If it was good enough for her back then, it should be good enough for her now, he reasoned.

Ciel walked back into the open living/dining/kitchen area to find Sebastian already on the sofa, looking ready to go. The larger man was dressed in dark jeans with a black vest and button down shirt, sleeves rolled up to his elbows. His red eyes lit up when he caught sight of Ciel. "You look nice!"

Ciel scratched the back of his neck and sat on the other end of the sofa. "Er, thanks. Lizzy picked it out."

Sebastian simply nodded and chatted cheerfully about office gossip, filling the silence while they waited. Ciel hummed at the appropriate intervals, not really listening but glad he wasn't required to participate.

Lizzy and Snake arrived just after eight. "Yay! You're already dressed!" She exclaimed upon seeing Ciel. "This saves so much time. It's a little too early for a bar just yet so we're going to start with dinner first, okay?" Ciel rolled his eyes. _Like I have a choice_ , he thought as Sebastian and Lizzy debated restaurants, eventually setting on one within walking distance of the bar Lizzy wanted to end up at.

Ciel had to admit that this trip was much more tolerable than previous ones had ever been. Sebastian turned out to be a solid match for Lizzy's energetic extroversion and did an admirable job of keeping up the conversation with her, allowing Ciel and Snake to quietly drift into the background as the two introverts preferred to do. In fact, Ciel made it well past the hour he'd agreed on before he even remembered they had an escape plan. They'd been in the bar for a while now and Ciel hadn't once thought of leaving – well, until an unwelcome hand planted itself squarely on his ass. Ciel tensed and whipped his head around, getting a nose full of liquor breath as a very drunk man slurred out "He-e-eya cutie."

He was a few beers in himself, but nowhere near drunk enough to let that slide. His arm whistled down with force, cutting through the air smoothly and knocking the offending hand off with a firm _smack_. Blue eyes hard as ice, he glared at the man and muttered, "Rude," before turning back to his group. Lizzy and Sebastian chatting animatedly, booze loosening them up even more. Even Snake had found someone to talk to on the other side of them.

Unfortunately, the drunken fool behind Ciel wasn't taking no for an answer, as drunken fools are prone to do. He grabbed Ciel's hips and spun him around on his bar stool. "E-e-y, that wasn't very nice," he chided. "I's just tryin' to be nice to ya. Wha's your name, cutie?"

"Dick. Off." Ciel stated firmly, shoving the drunk square in the chest to send him sprawling. Angry brown eyes shot daggers at him. Ciel snarled and stood. The man bucked up off the floor with a scowl, looking like he wanted to fight … before suddenly swallowing and backing away. Ciel's eyebrow rose but he wasn't about to look a gift horse in the mouth. Shrugging, he sat and spun back around to find all six-foot-three-inches of Sebastian looming over him, staring the retreating man down. Ciel's lip curled in disgust. _Of course it was him. Is it too much to ask for anyone to be intimidated by me?_ "Sit back down, you big worry wart. He's gone," Ciel muttered into his bottle. "And so is my desire to be here. Start looking sick already."

Sebastian gave him a concerned look before nodding and turning back to Lizzy. Ciel never found out what kind of an actor Sebastian was because gunshots rang out at that moment.

Women shrieked, lights popped, and the music screeched to a halt. Panicked people ran in every direction, pushing for the exits. Sebastian looked around, wide eyed. Lizzy, Ciel, and Snake locked gazes. As a unit, they pulled Sebastian down under the bar, safe from the gunshots and civilians knocking around. After the briefest team discussion via hand signals and slight facial expressions, Lizzy started up with the waterworks and Ciel shook Sebastian's shoulder. "Hey!" he shouted to be heard over the ruckus. "We need to get Lizzy out of here, alright?" Sebastian looked from Ciel to Lizzy, mascara running down her terrified face. His expression hardened and he nodded. "Follow the edge of the bar that way," Ciel directed, pointing. "Snake will lead Lizzy and I'll follow you."

Sebastian shook his head. "You get in front of me; I'll follow all of you."

More shots rang out. The sound of fighting increased and more bodies rushed past their hidey hole. Ciel huffed and shook his head. "There's no time to argue, just go!" He pushed Sebastian's shoulder as Lizzy tugged his arm from the other side. Glancing back frequently, Sebastian allowed himself to be led along, all four crouched low as they shuffle-ran along the edge of the bar.

A large body crashed between Ciel and Sebastian, knocking the smaller man down. Thankfully, Lizzy's strong grip and hysterical sobbing kept Sebastian from noticing until they were out of sight. She and Snake would get Sebastian out; Ciel was more than capable of taking care of himself. He kicked the stranger off of him and stood, taking stock of the situation. A few ruffians were fist fighting in the corner. Most of the patrons were either cowering under tables or running around like chickens with their heads cut off. _Real helpful, people_ , he thought sarcastically. One of the armed men was behind the bar with his hand stuffed in the register. Another held some employees at gunpoint next to the first. There were firearms scattered on the floor behind the gunmen, likely taken from the staff. If any of the shots had been fired by customers, they hadn't stuck around to shoot things out. _Oh, Texas, how you disappoint me._ Ciel thought, ducking back out of sight. _What happened to all those stories of little old ladies who stopped armed robbers with their concealed carry weapons?_

He was weighing the pros and cons of stepping in ( _I'm MI6, not a freaking superhero!_ ) when the choice was made for him.

"Oh, ho!" A familiar voice boomed. "What do we have here!?"

Ciel's chin fell to his chest and his eyes closed, 1,000% done with this night. "Just shoot me," he muttered. It would be so, so easy to scuttle out while the criminals turned that pompous moron into spandex Swiss cheese, but if anyone was going to kill him, it would be Ciel himself. He had not put up with that obnoxious sack of hero shit for two years only to have someone else get the satisfaction of murdering him. Determined, he dropped to the floor and slowly crawled to the farthest flip-top entrance that let employees get behind the bar. Peering around the corner, he noticed both gunmen were looking around, backs to him as they tried to spot the Demon Crow. Ciel squatted up on his haunches and started inching forward in a crouch, hands free and ready to grab one of the abandoned guns.

Big black boots slammed into the rearmost gunman as the Crow flew over the countertop from Ciel's right. The bald man smashed to the floor with a _thump_ , head producing a nasty ripe melon noise that made Ciel wince. The Crow didn't pause, though. He kicked out a leg and spun, toppling the other gunman before he could aim or fire. The vigilante kicked the gun out of the thug's hand and scanned the room, looking for any more threats. The fist fighters must have cleared out because the Demon Crow's shoulders relaxed. He turned to the huddle of employees and helped them stand, reassuring them that they were safe now and herding them toward the other flip-top exit, away from the unconscious gunmen.

Apparently the _thump_ had sounded worse than it felt, because Melon Head sprang up suddenly, snatching at one of the pistols. Ciel grinned fiercely, glad he would finally get to work out some of his frustration. He lunged forward, grabbing the barrel of a shotgun and swinging it like a golf club at the tender temple of baldy's bare head. _Fore!_ he thought, pleased as the dirt bag crumpled.

The Demon Crow whipped around at the sound and stared, stunned. Ciel just smirked and dropped the shotgun. "Don't turn your back on the bad guys, stupid."

The Crow's chin flapped open and closed under his mask. "I-I-" he stammered.

Ciel rolled his eyes. "You really _are_ stupid, aren't you?" The words felt even more insulting in his heavy southern twang, making Ciel smile. He wiped his hands on his pants and lifted the flip-top, walking out. "You should probably tie them up or something," he noted disinterestedly without turning around. "Not that I care."

Cool night air blew against his face as he followed the gaggle of employees out the front door where onlookers clogged the street and sidewalks. The police had just arrived and were pushing people back, clearing an area around the bar. Ciel turned to the right and wove through the crowd, walking until he got to the other side of the street. He waited patiently for his team to find him, eyes flicking over the mass of people lit by blue strobing lights. After a few minutes of not seeing Lizzy or Snake, he pulled out his phone, preparing to text them.

"Ciel!" Lizzy cried out of nowhere, glomping him.

"Gah!" he shouted, phone falling to the pavement. "What the hell, woman!" Snake walked up at a more sedate pace behind her. Relief flooded through Ciel before he realized they were one short. "Wait, where's Sebastian?" He scanned the area behind Snake repeatedly, not seeing the tall man anywhere.

Lizzy bit her lip and Snake shook his head. "We lost him in the crowd. Maybe he went back in for you," the soft-spoken man suggested.

Ciel frowned and snatched his phone up before it could get trampled. He was about to call Sebastian when he suddenly heard the man shouting his name. Ciel's head snapped up and he found that the large man had pushed his way to the front of the crowd and was trying to get past an officer. Ciel sighed and pointed. Snake nodded and slithered off to retrieve the irate giant who was clearly intent on getting back in that building, cop or no cop. The albino practically had to turn Sebastian's head and force him to look at Ciel (who waved sarcastically) before he stopped arguing.

Ciel paled as Sebastian thundered toward him. "Oh shit," was all he had time to breathe out before he was crushed to a broad chest.

"I'm so glad you're okay!" Sebastian cried, pressing his cheek to the top of Ciel's dark silver head and holding him tight.

"Can't. Breathe." Ciel wheezed, too trapped to struggle.

He was immediately released with a quiet, "Sorry."

Ciel brushed his hands over his shirt and hair before eyeing Sebastian, who looked incredibly disheveled but uninjured. "You good?" Sebastian nodded. "Good. Now let's get the hell out of here." He and Lizzy led the way, Snake and Sebastian following behind. Sebastian kept a hand on Ciel's shoulder, clearly unwilling to let the smaller man out of his sight again in some alpha male protective bullshit way, Ciel supposed. Looking at Lizzy, he frowned and muttered, "The next time you invite me out, I'm going to remind you of this night. It's going to be my trump card for the rest of my life."

She sighed, not arguing.

An electronic ding caught Ciel's attention and he watched as Lizzy pulled her phone out. She held it close to her body, reading a message. The corner of her lip twisted up and she whispered, "They found one. New mission tomorrow."


	3. Chapter 3

" _Oh my gosh, that would look so cute on you!_ "

"Lizzy. Be _quiet._ I'm trying to crack a safe." Ciel squatted in front of a little square safe, ear pressed to the cool metal as he dialed the tumbler and listened for clicks. It was an older model, freestanding on four squat legs and easily cracked. It was unfortunately high enough quality that he couldn't bounce it, but not worth the trouble of breaking out power tools.

" _Sor-ry_ ," she grumbled into his ear insincerely. " _You just need all the fashion help you can get._ "

Ciel sighed and tried to tune her out. Snake had put cameras on the front and back of his helmet today, allowing them to keep an eye on him as he worked. If this was any indication of what he'd have to put up with now that Lizzy could peek in on him, he'd be taking them back off today, too. While Ciel was working, she was apparently fixated on the clothing racks behind him.

Tonight's mission had taken him into Chinatown, specifically to a store named Lau's Emporium, where H.Q. thought the owner was importing more than Chinese goods. They still had no leads on Chamber's master list, but were fairly certain Lau was one rung on their human trafficking ladder.

"Eureka," Ciel breathed when the safe's lever finally clicked down. He pulled three thick books out, ignoring a fat stack of cash and a plastic baggie of what were undoubtedly narcotics. He flipped the books open one by one, showing each page to the camera. "You getting this?"

" _Saber says they're coming through clearly. Keep going_ ," Snake answered, surprising Ciel. Lizzy must be busy doing something else.

"Roger," Ciel muttered, continuing his slow and steady flipping. He finished the first book and started on the second, leaving each page flat and visible for as solid second before turning it. He couldn't have read them if he wanted to; they were all in some scratchy symbol language, probably Chinese if the owner actually was Chinese and it wasn't just a gimmick. Ciel was in the middle of the third book when he heard banging. "Guys?" he whispered, pausing in his flipping to look around. "I think someone's coming."

" _What? The security system is still armed-_ "

Keys jingled in the lock at the front of the store, a heavily-loaded chain banging on the glass door. The alarm blared as the door opened. Ciel hastily flipped through the last few pages of the third book, trying to get at least a flash of them on camera before shoving everything back into the safe and closing it. He heard a series of _blips_ as a key code was punched in, shutting off the alarm. A few masculine voices laughed, growing rapidly closer to Ciel's location in the back. Ciel scuttled off behind a rack of clothes, assuming the men were heading for the drugs or cash in the safe. He couldn't make out what they were saying because they spoke a foreign language but they seemed happy, not suspicious, so he doubted they were there because of him.

They made a beeline for the safe, flipping it open in seconds and withdrawing the bag of white powder. They laughed, pushing each other and horsing around as they started drawing lines on the counter. Ciel rolled his eyes, wishing they'd hurry up. 

" _Those are members of the Kong-Rong gang,_ " Lizzy whispered, making Ciel jump. " _I looked up the patches on their shirts._ " Ciel didn't dare respond with the men so close. He nodded, hoping Lizzy would understand his acknowledgement from the bouncing of the camera. The Kong-Rong's were brutal. In fact, they'd chased almost all of the mobs and cartels out of the city with their violent methods, leaving them as the sole source of drugs in the area. Not even the Demon Crow was stupid enough to fight them. 

Ciel's calves burned from squatting. He wanted nothing more than to get out of there and honestly might have died a little inside when two more Kong-Rong's walked in. He could hear Lizzy breathing heavily in his ear. The newcomers joined the others at the counter, taking up a rolled bill to snort their own lines. Ciel squeezed his eyes closed. They couldn't stay here forever. He'd just have to wait it out.

He waited for what felt like an eternity. His calves went from aching to numb to pin-pricking. Ciel gritted his teeth, peering between two long tunics to see the four assholes still leaning against the counter, chatting animatedly. They clearly weren't leaving any time soon, which presented Ciel with a dilemma: should he wait until they left or were they waiting on even more people to arrive? As tough as it would be to get away from four Kong-Rongs, he might as well shoot himself now if more were coming. It would be better than what they would do to him.

Ciel chewed his lip and eyed the men. They had all done lines of what he assumed was cocaine and it had definitely been long enough for the drug to kick in. This was probably the best shot he was going to get. _Geronimo!_ he thought as he flung himself out of the clothing rack and toward the door he hoped was unlocked. His numb legs made him stumble and waddle, but Ciel didn't slow. Surprised voices shouted behind him, spurring him on. He crashed through the front door, tumbling into the street and past three new, sober Kong-Rongs who were about to enter. One slashed out at him with a knife, probably following the shouted orders of someone inside. The blade connected, but fortunately his armored suit kept it from breaking skin.

He _definitely_ didn't want to stop now.

Riding a new rush of adrenaline, Ciel sprinted down the street, jumping at the sound of a gunshot. This case was going to be the death of him, he was sure of it. Never in his life had he had so many close calls. Ciel made it around the corner and kept on going, twisting and weaving without doubling back. Eventually, the sound of pursuit died off. Ciel slowed to a stop, wedging himself between two dumpsters and panting.

" _–talk to me!_ " Lizzy was screaming into his headphone. " _I swear to God if you don't say something –_ "

"Ow," he panted. "Loud."

Lizzy sighed. " _Thank god. Are you hurt?_ "

"No, the suit did good." Ciel looked at his arm where the knife had slashed. He could see a damaged area on the armored sleeve, but it hadn't broken through. "Did you get all the pages?"

" _Yeah,_ " she breathed, relieved. " _We'll get them to H.Q. and they'll be translated in no time._ "

"Sweet. Cause I'm not going back in there."

Lizzy laughed. " _I don't blame you. My GOD I've never been so scared in my life!_ "

" _You've_ never been so scared?" Ciel snorted. "I think I need new pants."

" _Ew, you're not serious are you?_ "

Ciel chuckled, not answering. He poked his nose out, looking both ways down the ally. The coast was clear. "I'm not walking back to D.P. Four tonight. I just want to go home and bask in the glory of not dying."

" _Affirmative_ ," Lizzy said. " _Find a safe place to sit still for a minute and Snake will come pick you up_."

Ciel made it two more streets over, shielding himself in a recessed doorway as he waited for Snake to follow the GPS in his helmet. The familiar black sedan slowed just long enough for Ciel to spring into the backseat before driving off. Ciel eyed the black duffle bag under his feet. "Snake?"

"Saber says you need to put on street clothes so your roommate doesn't ask questions."

"Fuck," Ciel breathed. _Roommate. Right._ "Fine, but I'm not wiggling out of the suit back here. I'm leaving the helmet with you and I'll drop the rest off at Home Base on Monday while he's at work." Snake nodded, eyes on the road as Ciel shimmied into a pair of sweatpants and pulled a hoodie over his torso. Ciel stared silently out the window until they arrived at his apartment, glad for the chance to catch his breath. Snake didn't push conversation on him. Snake was good like that.

Lizzy jogged up as Snake pulled up to the curb behind the building, tossing Ciel's keys to him. "Your car's on the south end of the lot," she said, settling into the passenger seat.

Ciel nodded. "Thanks for bringing it."

"O-o-o-h!" Lizzy sprang back out of the car to hug him. "I'm just so glad you're okay!"

"Saber," Snake hissed.

"I know, I know. Let's get out of here before anyone sees us. Bye!"

Ciel didn't stand around waving or watching them drive off. They should have been gone almost as soon as they arrived, but Elizabeth had clearly been shaken enough by tonight's close-call to disregard protocol for a few seconds. He was up the back stairs and in his apartment within seconds, annoyed to feel his hands shaking as the adrenaline wore off.

_Huh, no Sebastian. That's good at least._

Ciel walked straight into his bedroom, locking the door behind him, anxious to get out of the suit. His calf twinged as he rolled the snug pants off. He rubbed at the stinging spot and pulled back bloody fingers. _Damn!_ He twisted around to see the back of his calf, hissing when he spotted a bullet graze. The compression pants coupled with adrenaline had kept him from noticing the wound. _That was an even closer call than I thought!_ Ciel thought in amazement.

Shaking his head to clear it, he padded into his connected bathroom and dug under the sink for his First Aid kit, frowning when he couldn't find it. _Oh, right! Finny borrowed it last month. It must be in the other bathroom._ Ciel walked straight to his door, opening it before immediately slamming it closed again. _Can't go starkers,_ he grumbled internally, cursing the existence of his roommate. If the head boss man hadn't insisted on the entire team going deep cover with flawless façades of normality (crappy normal jobs, roommates, the works) Ciel would so be living alone. He may not need Sebastian's money or company, but he was a damn good alibi and cover. Ciel could still grumble about being forced to get dressed just to fetch some bloody bandages from the other room, though.

Now that he knew it was there, the darned cut _hurt_. He looked both ways like he was crossing the street before limping across the living room to Sebastian's bathroom. The man still wasn't in the main area, so he was either already asleep or out doing his own thing on a Saturday night. Ciel didn't really care.

"Ah-ha!" he muttered, extracting the white and red metal box from under Finny/Sebastian's counter. He sat it beside the sink and popped it open, frowning at its nearly barren state. Freaking Finny used over half the damn box! Who knew gardening was such a dangerous hobby? Ciel's lip curled in distaste as he examined the last few drops of alcohol sloshing around in the corner of the plastic bottle. Sighing, he sat it on the counter and rooted around for Neosporin, gauze, and a bandage. He lifted his pant leg, trying to decide if the large bandage would work or if he should just tape a big pad of gauze over it when the front door rattled open.

Seeing the light on in his own bathroom, Sebastian called, "Ciel?" curious why the blue-eyed man would be in there.

Ciel cursed, foot slipping off the toilet where he had it propped up. "Yeah, in here." He resettled himself more securely, rolling his pant leg back up and twisting at an awkward angle to see the wound.

Sebastian gasped from behind him. "Your leg! What happened?"

Ciel shrugged, lying effortlessly, "I caught it on the edge of the dumpster when I took out the trash; no big deal."

A large hand knocked his out of the way when he reached for the alcohol. "Let me. That's got to be hard for you to reach."

Ciel's first instinct was to argue (as always), but it was midnight and he was tired and he just got _shot_ , even if it was only a graze, so he reasoned that not turning himself into a human pretzel right now sounded better than pointlessly resisting. "Fine." He dropped his foot and stood up straight, allowing Sebastian to kneel down behind him. Ciel gritted his teeth as he felt the sting of alcohol, but didn't cry out. Sebastian's fingertips gently prodded around the cut, examining for dirt and debris, before slathering it with Neosporin and smoothing the large bandage over it.

"You're lucky; it was shallow and clean."

Ciel nodded. "Yeah, thanks. Guess dumpsters aren't that big of a threat."

Sebastian chuckled, putting up the kit. "I guess not. I thought it might have been from last night at first."

Ciel shook his head. "Nope. I got out of that just fine."

Sebastian smiled down at him kindly. "I know, I was just really worried about you. I feel bad for abandoning you like I did. I swear I didn't know you weren't behind me or I would have stopped."

Ciel rolled his eyes at Sebastian's millionth apology. "Please. I'm not a baby." He shoved past the bigger man, intent on sitting down before he fell down out of exhaustion.

Sebastian followed close behind, amusement dancing in the depths of crimson orbs. "No, clearly not. You still haven't told me what happened in there."

Ciel plunked down on the sofa and let his head fall back. "What's to tell? Some drunk knocked me away from you and I got out as soon as I could."

"You were in there for a while, Ciel," Sebastian chided, watching him intently from the other end of the couch. It wasn't a question, so the smaller man just continued staring at the ceiling in silence, eyes unfocused. Trying a different approach, Sebastian noted, "The news said the Demon Crow was there. Did you see him?" Ciel made a rude noise. Sebastian's brows drew together. "Was that a 'yes' snort or a 'no' snort?"

Ciel squeezed his eyes closed and grimaced before admitting, "Yeah, I saw him," in an unhappy tone.

"Wasn't that cool?" Sebastian asked excitedly.

Ciel made a noise of disgust. _God, he's another Crow-obsessed moron_. "No, not really."

Sebastian stared at him for a quiet moment before asking, "What do you mean?"

 _Great, here we go._ Discussing the Demon Crow was akin to talking politics; almost everyone in the city held a strong view of him (pro or con) and arguments often got heated. Heaving a weary sigh, Ciel explained: "He's a vigilante, and not a very good one at that. He breaks the laws almost as much as the criminals, destroys property, inflames situations that would otherwise die out on their own, and prances around like he just saved the whole damn planet when all he does is make things worse. He's a bumbling moron in spandex who needs to get out of the way so professionals can do their jobs in peace."

Sebastian was silent long enough that Ciel looked over to see his shocked face. Ciel ran a hand over his eyes, softening his words with, "Look, that's just my opinion, okay? I get that you probably like him or whatever, and that's fine, but I don't." Ciel stood abruptly before Sebastian could respond. Not in the mood to discuss the Crow, he announced, "And I'm tired. I'm going to bed. I'll see you in the morning."

"Night," Sebastian said softly to Ciel's back as he left.

\---

Ciel awoke to the aroma of food. Wiggling down deeper into the pillows and covers, he smiled. Sebastian really hadn't been kidding when he said he was a good cook and the man seemed to be determined to prove it at every opportunity. If putting up with Sebastian's existence meant he got hot breakfast on the weekends and home cooked dinners all week, Ciel wasn't going to fight about it. He was light years above Pluto, the nudist who left dirty dishes and rotten food everywhere, Redmond, who filled a bathtub with Ciel's expensive first-flush tea to marinate himself, and Finny, who constantly broke everything. _Everything_.

He knew Sebastian wouldn't knock on his door this early and risk waking him, so Ciel dragged himself out of bed, wincing as the bandage on his calf pulled. He visited the bathroom and splashed a little water on his face, not bothering to comb his hair.

"Morning," Sebastian stated from the kitchen as Ciel emerged. Dressed in cotton sleep pants and a white tee, he was moving the last strips of crispy bacon onto a plate stacked with napkins to absorb the grease. "I was just about to do eggs. How to you like yours?"

"Fried, please."

The larger man nodded, moving to comply. Ciel walked around him, looking curiously at the streaky bacon and coffee, which was just hissing and sputtering its last. Shaking his head, he pulled out his favorite box of Earl Grey and set about brewing a small pot. Sebastian pushed slices of toast into the toaster as he minded the eggs. At least it looked like real food, as opposed to those fat, fluffy pancakes he tried to pass off as breakfast yesterday. 

Sebastian loaded both plates and brought them to the table, returning to the kitchen briefly to pour himself a cup of coffee.

"You know, I do have tomatoes and mushrooms fridge if you want," Ciel noted, biting into his toast.

Sebastian cocked his head. "Yes, I saw. Do you want an omelet instead?"

"No, I just mean if you want them." He laughed at Sebastian's confusion. "You really have gone native, haven't you? How long have you been here?"

Understanding washed over Sebastian's features. "A while."

Ciel chuckled. "I can tell. You've done a good job assimilating," he complimented, secretly impressed with how well Sebastian had picked up American terminology and cuisine. He knew how hard it was to adapt, constantly struggling with little things like saying the American 'R&D' rather than the British 'RTD,' or 'elevator' instead of 'lift.' Though it was probably easier on Sebastian who was just trying to adapt than it was on Ciel who had to pretend to _be_ an American.

Sebastian smiled faintly. "Thanks, I guess." He sipped his coffee. "Elizabeth is English, isn't she? Is that why you know so much about us?"

Ciel nodded, glad for the excuse. "She's from Blackpool. I'm down with all your weird customs through her."

Laughter rang out. "One person does not a country make, you imitation Yankee" Sebastian admonished, shaking a finger playfully.

Ciel rolled his eyes. "Yeah, yeah."

"So, what are your plans for today?" Sebastian asked.

Ciel sipped his tea and considered. "Cleaning. And Laundry. And groceries."

"Ah, I see your list is the same as mine, then. Care to join forces?"

Ciel eyed him. "I don't see how. It only takes one person to sit by the washing machine or push a grocery cart."

"But isn't it more fun when you can share the experience?"

Ciel arched a brow, wondering that Sebastian was on about. "It's laundry. I don't see how two of us staring at the machine could possibly make it fun."

"You'll just have to find out, then, won't you?" the black-haired man teased.

Ciel eventually decided that allowing Sebastian to tag along wouldn't negatively impact his chores, so he grudgingly allowed it. Sebastian had made him breakfast after all. If he wanted to watch clothes tumble in a machine so badly, who was Ciel to say no? They gathered up their things and carried loaded baskets down to the building's laundry room together. Sebastian chatted lightly as they loaded the machines and sat in the line of chairs against one wall to wait. Signs reading "Do not leave loads unattended" and "Leave no sock behind" plastered every wall, treating laundry with the same seriousness as leaving a child in a hot car. Ciel would normally play games on his phone to pass the time, but the larger man was doing a decent job of being interesting, so Ciel allowed himself to listen, responding with the appropriate grunts when necessary.

"Is there anything you're _not_ good at?" Ciel asked in awe as he watched Sebastian's graceful fingers flip shirts into neat squares and roll socks into perfect balls. Seriously: cooking food, folding laundry, patching up bullet wounds; what _couldn't_ this guy do?

Sebastian huffed a self-deprecating laugh, muttering darkly, "Obviously." Ciel examined the taller man's face closely, unused to the strange twinge of sadness on it. Sebastian was usually nothing but a bundle of humor and high spirits. Catching Ciel looking, Sebastian quirked a lip in an attempt at his usual levity. "Can't be good at everything, right?" Ciel just continued staring at him, as if waiting for a response to an unasked question. "Anyway, I think we've done enough to warrant a break, don't you?"

Ciel pushed his lips to one side, clearly disagreeing. "We did one load of laundry. I hardly think that justifies a break."

"Not even if that break includes ice cream?"

Ciel tossed the last few things into his basket, not caring how sloppy it looked next to Sebastian's Ikea centerfold. "If you're buying, I'm not going to fight it. But we still don't deserve a break for this."

Sebastian smiled at him, reaching out to ruffle his hair. "Good enough for me."

"Hey," Ciel grumbled, running his fingers through his hair to tame it. "Watch it."

Much to Ciel's annoyance, Sebastian took him out, bought him ice cream, talked him into a walk around the park, and kept him thoroughly entertained until the sun set. Well, maybe all that wasn't so bad if Ciel were to be completely honest. Sebastian was actually okay, but it was late and they still needed to clean the apartment and get groceries.

He snatched up the list as soon as they returned and announced, "I'm going to get this; you clean while I'm gone."

Sebastian, who seemed to be in a much better mood, nodded. "Fair enough. Want me to do your bathroom while I'm at it?" Ciel considered briefly before shaking his head. It was clean enough and he didn't want to risk Sebastian finding anything suspicious (not that he ever left anything out, but better safe than sorry). "Okay, I'll get started then. See you when you get back."

Ciel lifted a hand disinterestedly as he walked out. He drove his little red Fiat to the corner store. It wasn't a long walk, but he wouldn't be able to carry all the bags by himself in one trip. He had the layout down pat and was able to chuck everything into his buggy in one pass without slowing. Smirking, he patted himself on the back at getting the better part of the deal. He would be home in minutes and Sebastian would probably be stuck cleaning for another half hour.

"Have a nice night!" the teenage cashier called to his back.

Ciel was too distracted to pay her much mind. The light over his car had gone out while he was inside, casting it into a circle of darkness. Frowning, he skimmed his eyes over the surrounding area. There were a few other cars and even fewer people, but it wasn't midnight-in-a-horror-movie deserted, so he wasn't _too_ worried. He pushed the buggy up behind his car and walked a quick circuit to check that no one was lurking. He then crouched down and checked under his car and the surrounding ones. No bombs, no feet. After a few minutes on high alert, he shrugged. He didn't see anyone suspicious and families with giggling children were still passing close by, so he had to admit everything was fine. Starting to feel stupid for flipping out over a burnt out lamp, Ciel finally loaded the groceries into the back of his car and quickly returned the cart. _So much for getting to watch Sebastian clean._ He snorted a laugh at the metal image of Sebastian in a French maid's uniform.

"Something funny?" an all-too-familiar American accent drawled from above.

Ciel's head whipped up to see the Demon Crow perched on the top of his little car and he scowled. "Get the fuck off of there before you crush it, fatass." The Crow stared at him in shocked silence before sliding down the far side with a long, obnoxious squeak. Ciel slapped a palm over his face, taking a deep breath and counting to ten. His immediate irritation was washed away in a flood of dread, head snapping up to stare at the Crow with wide eyes. "Are you following me!?" he demanded, suddenly freaking out. Had this moron figured out who he was or was it just a sick coincidence that they were now bumping into each other when Ciel was out of uniform?

"N-no! No," the Crow said, stepping forward with hands lifted. "I just saw you as I was passing by. I recognized you and wanted to say thank you for the help on Friday."

Ciel glared, clenching his jaw and not responding.

"I hope you didn't get hurt," the Crow offered politely to break the silence, head tilted to the side, expression hidden under his full-face mask.

"Piss off," Ciel spat. He wanted to storm off, but unfortunately the vigilante was between him and the driver's side door. The thought of his groceries in the back of his car made him frown deeper. "And move." Not waiting for a response, he stepped forward, placing a hand on the Demon Crow's chest and pushing him back. To his surprise, the larger man allowed himself to be moved, stepping back until Ciel could open the door.

"Wait!" The Crow grabbed the edge of Ciel's door to keep him from closing it.

Ciel narrowed his eyes and considered slamming it shut on his fingers for, oh, a really satisfying 0.02 seconds, but luckily for the Crow he wasn't a complete asshole. "What do you want from me, freak?" Maybe just a small asshole.

"Have I … hurt you somehow? You seem to be mad at me," the vigilante said softly.

Ciel's eyebrows rose at the sound of his concern. _You beat the snot out of me multiple times. You constantly sabotage my missions. You're currently letting human traffickers roam free because of your ignorance and you want to know if you_ hurt _me?_ Face twisted into a nasty snarl, Ciel growled emphatically, " _Yes_. You're a menace. Now leave me the hell alone." He gave the door a warning wiggle before slamming it closed and revving his engine to life, looking anywhere but at the Crow.

Ciel allowed himself a good fume on the short ride back to the apartment. _Obnoxious asshat, ruining a good night like that._

The Crow was annoying, but it didn't seem like he knew anything about Ciel being part of The Queen's Watchdog. He wouldn't have had to ask about hurting him and he sure as shit wouldn't have been concerned about it. The big oaf probably would have tackled him right then and there in the parking lot while shouting some TV-inspired nonsense about truth, justice, and the American way. Ciel's lip quirked. Nah, he was good.

He parked under the glow of a bright floodlight outside his building and took a few minutes to look over his car. There was a big, black rubber skid mark where the Crow had dragged his boot down the hood climbing down, but no dents or scratches. Shrugging, Ciel loaded his arms with all the grocery bags and waddled up to his door before dropping them with a grunt. He fumbled with his keys, pushing open the door to call, "A little help here?" He brought the bags in by twos and threes, setting them on the freshly-cleaned kitchen counters, until they were all in. He closed and locked the door. "Sebastian?"

_Bang-thud._

Ciel's head tilted, looking at Sebastian's door. "Sebastian?" he called again, getting worried. He heard some rustling and rapidly approaching feet.

Sebastian flung open his bedroom door with a flushed face and disheveled hair. "Ciel! You're back. I, uh, didn't hear you," he admitted, rubbing the back of his neck and looking anywhere but Ciel's eyes.

"Ye-a-ah," Ciel drawled, looking him over. He had a few guesses about what Sebastian had been up to. "Stop being weird and help me put up the food."

Sebastian nodded a little too enthusiastically. "Yes, yes, of course."

"Weird," Ciel muttered again, leading the way. He squatted next to the pantry, putting away the dry goods while Sebastian dealt with the fridge and freezer. Unnerved by the quiet, Ciel watched him, noticing that the larger man was once again serious, bordering on gloomy. After he sorted the last of the cans, Ciel reached out to lay a hand on Sebastian's arm. "Are you … okay?"

Sebastian jerked at the unexpected contact, looking down through his long fringe of hair. "Uh, yeah. Yes." He swallowed before placing his hand over Ciels and forcing a smile. "I'm fine, thank you."

"Okay," Ciel allowed. If Sebastian didn't want to talk about it, he wasn't going to push. Instead, he gathered up the plastic bags and stuffed them under the sink to recycle later. "I had fun today," he noted impulsively to make the giant dope grin, not that he looked up to check.

"I'm glad. Maybe we can do it again some time?" Yep, if his tone was any indication, Sebastian was beaming. The dork.

Back still facing Sebastian, Ciel rolled his eyes, secretly pleased. "Well, I _do_ wash my clothes every week. I guess you can tag along."

Sebastian chuckled, undeterred by Ciel's gruff response. He knew Ciel wouldn't have agreed at all if he didn't genuinely want to do it. "Brilliant. I look forward to the next time we team up against the dark forces of dirty laundry!"

Ciel shot a reproachful look over his shoulder at that. "God, you're weird." He walked to his bedroom, calling over his shoulder, "See you tomorrow." He didn't have to look to know that the big dweeb was smiling after him.


	4. Chapter 4

It had been over a week since anything exciting had happened and Ciel was dying of boredom. It was probably a good thing, as it gave H.Q. time to repair his suit and carefully plan out his next job so that he didn't end up somewhere dangerous, like, oh say, _trapped in a murderous, drug-running, human-trafficking gangster's lair_. He was still sore about that one.

Tonight he was sprawled out comfortably on the sofa with the TV playing an action movie, computer in his lap. Sebastian had gone out with Bard, so Ciel had free run of the apartment. _Just as I like it_ , he thought smugly, burrowing deeper into the throw blanket. Ciel laughed at the ridiculous explosions and stupid action tropes playing out on the screen, cackling madly when the "hero" did stupid or impossible things. Honestly, what was with the whole "walking slowly away from an explosion" shot in every film? Does shrapnel not exist in Hollywood? No wonder the Crow was such a complete moron if this is the garbage he learned from.

Ciel nudged the pizza box open, grabbing the last slice and chomping into it happily.

With a familiar _pop-click-whoosh_ , the front door unlocked and opened. "Sebastian!" Ciel called, mouth full of pizza.

The larger man smiled and said softly, "Hey little buddy. Miss me?"

"Psh, no," Ciel turned away quickly. "How was Bard?"

Sebastian shuffled past, heading toward his room. "Good. Good. I'll be right back."

Ciel nodded, eyes still on the screen to catch the final minutes of his movie. When the final credits rolled, he blew a raspberry at it. _What a load of garbage._ He unwrapped himself and carried his cup to the kitchen for a refill, frowning when he felt something wet under his bare foot. He lifted up his heel to see … red? Looking around, he found a few bloody drops in the entryway, leading past the kitchen and down the hall. _Sebastian?_ Ciel set his cup down with a firm thump and marched to Sebastian's bedroom door, banging on it loudly. "Hey! Open up."

"One minute."

"No, right fucking now, Sebastian."

Ciel heard a grunt before Sebastian pulled the door open, fully dressed and looking mostly normal, if a little pinched. One hand was pressed to his side. "What's wrong?"

Ciel stared him down hard for ten uncomfortable silent seconds. "You got blood on my floor."

"Um," Sebastian blinked unintelligently, looking past Ciel to the few drops of bright red on the white carpet. "I'm sorry?"

"Tch, you better be. What happened?"

"Nothing."

Ciel clenched his jaw. "Get your ass in that bathroom and show me your 'nothing.'"

"I really don't –"

"Not a request. Move." Ciel grabbed his free arm and pulled him bodily into the bathroom.

"Ciel, wait. I'm fine. Honest."

"Fine people don't bleed. Strip." Ciel stood blocking the door, arms folded. Sebastian's eyes widened like saucers. With a great sigh, Ciel added logically, "You patched me up last week. It's my turn to do you."

Sebastian's lip quirked at that. Snickering at Ciel's word choice, he peeled off his t-shirt to reveal a toned torso covered in bruises, a fresh cut oozing on his left side. Ciel quirked a brow, eyes darting pointedly from Sebastian's chest to his eyes and back. There were new black bruises, old purple bruises, and faded yellow-green ones. Countless old scars littered the skin like constellations. "The fuck's this?" Ciel finally asked, stunned.

"A cut," Sebastian said, obtusely ignoring Ciel's real question and pointing at the fresh blood.

Ciel skewered him with a dirty look and pulled out the freshly restocked First Aid kit. "You're not in some kind of stupid Fight Club, are you?" Maybe Finny hadn't used up the old kit after all.

Sebastian breathed out a faint laugh, "No, not exactly. I just don't know when to back down."

Ciel rolled his eyes. "Moron. What are all these bruises from, anyway?" Sebastian looked away and Ciel's eyes narrowed. He stepped around so he could see Sebastian's face. "Hey, is someone hurting you?"

Sebastian looked surprised at the suggestion. Waving his hands for emphasis, he met Ciel's murderous gaze and said quickly, "No, no, not the way you're thinking. It's not domestic abuse or anything. I have a bad habit of breaking up fights and sticking my nose where it doesn't belong."

Ciel sighed, stepping back over to the kit. That did sound like Sebastian, caring to a fault. "Well stop it, okay? You don't need to get yourself hurt like this because of other people's problems." He lifted Sebastian's arm and gently dabbed at the slice, grimacing as the edges pulled apart and more blood leaked out. "Shit, you need stitches. We should take you to the hospital."

"Can't you do it?" Sebastian asked.

Ciel examined him skeptically for a moment before admitting, "Yeah, but don't you want painkillers and a professional?"

Sebastian shook his head, looking pale. "I'd rather not. I trust you."

"Fine," Ciel huffed. "But only if you tell me what happened." He waited for Sebastian's nod before washing his hands, digging out a pre-threaded needle, and slapping on some gloves. He dabbed the cut with even more alcohol and set to work. "Talk or I'll make it hurt."

"It already hurts," Sebastian complained. "I was on my way home when I saw a girl getting mugged by a man with a knife. I chased him off and took her home. It was no big deal." He told the story like he was stating the weather, ending with a shrug. _Sunny with a 70% chance of stabbing. Back to you, Ted._

Ciel stared up at him with wide eyes. "That was … " Sebastian winced, waiting for him to say 'dumb' or 'irresponsible.' Ciel had made it very clear how much he hated vigilantes. "… really awesome of you." Sebastian's eyes flew open, looking down.

"Really?"

Ciel snipped the end of the thread and turned to throw it away. "Yeah." He dabbed on some Neosporin and covered the suture with a Band-Aid before peeling off the gloves and throwing them away, too. "You saved her. That was good." He put the kit under the sink. He had been kicking around the idea of moving it back to his room, but decided now that it might do more good out here. Ciel looked at Sebastian's dopey grin, obviously thrilled by his praise, and rolled his eyes. "You probably shouldn't have gotten yourself stabbed, though, stupid."

Sebastian laughed, smiling widely. "I'll keep that in mind for next time."

Ciel groaned. "No, no next time. Don't go looking for trouble." He turned and walked back out into the living room to sit back down on the couch.

"I can't just stand by while people get hurt," Sebastian called after him, heading in the other direction toward his room. He threw the bloody black t-shirt in his hamper to deal with later and pulled out a fresh one.

"Oh, yes you can," Ciel called back from the sofa. "It's called minding your own business."

"If I'd done that, then that poor girl would have been robbed tonight, or worse," Sebastian retorted, coming out to sit on the opposite end of the couch. "Didn't you say it was good that I helped her?"

"Ugh," Ciel grunted. "Don't twist my words around like that! I just don't want you getting hurt. And stop smiling!"

Eyes in happy crescents, Sebastian apologized, "Sorry. Can't help it."

"Blerg. Why the hell are you sitting, anyway? Go get that blood out of my carpet before it dries."

"Right. Sorry."

\---

The information collected by The Queen's Watchdog at Lau's Emporium was enough for a Black Ops team to dismantle that part of Kong-Rong's operation and rescue the kidnapped British girls, or so Snake passed on from the higher-ups. Ciel's group was very pleased. What was even better was the new information the extraction team uncovered, leading them to another rung on Chamber's ladder: the Vanel family. While the Kong-Rongs despised any other criminal organization and did their best to drive them away, Chamber's Inc. clearly did not share that sentiment and sold to both groups, Chinese gang and Italian mafia alike.

Ciel's current problem, however, was getting Sebastian to go the hell away so he could make it to DP1 on time. The man had been stuck to his side like glue since Ciel patched him up. Strangely, Ciel hadn't noticed or minded this fact until he realized there was no way to sneak out. He was currently holed up in his room hoping Sebastian would take the hint.

"Ciel, want to watch a movie?" Sebastian called from right outside his door. Attempt number four to engage him.

"No, I'm busy."

"I've got _Batman and Robin_ or _X-men_."

"Ew, how are either of those supposed to make me change my mind?"

"They're classic." Sebastian tried to open the door but the handle was locked. Ciel narrowed his eyes. He knew better than to try to come in here.

"Don't you need to be stupid somewhere else?"

"Not until nine."

Ciel laughed in spite of himself. Clearly the "Ignore Him Until He Goes Away" tactic wasn't working; time for the direct approach. Ciel pushed his laptop to the side and walked to the door, unlocking and opening it to stare Sebastian in the face. The taller man was nearly pressed against the door so they ended up toe-to-toe. "Look, I have some things I need to take care of today. I told you when you moved in that there are times I'll need quiet while I work from home, and this is one of them." He kindly left out 'So piss off' because Sebastian had just made him laugh.

Sebastian's eyes widened. "Oh, I didn't know you were working. I'll keep out of your hair, then." Sebastian leaned down to kiss him on the forehead before walking off, making Ciel turn beet red and stutter at his back. _What the actual fuck was that?_

" _He likes you, dummy_ ," Lizzy said over the comm later that night when Ciel asked her about it.

"Does not," Ciel fired back automatically. He was currently squatted under Azzurro Vanel's home desk, planting a bug. Everyone who lived in the mansion was on holiday, the staff had retired to their rooms hours ago, and Lizzy cut the alarm off remotely, leaving Ciel free to move around all night if necessary so long as he didn't do anything to alert the perimeter guards. Tonight's mission was even more boring than picking filing cabinet locks: he just had to plant bugs and cameras. No muss, no fuss, and absolutely _no_ getting shot at. Any other time, he would be complaining, but after the Kong-Rongs, he was glad for the break. It also gave him a chance to figure out what was wrong with Sebastian.

" _Ugh, do you always have to be so contrary? The man has a huge crush on you!_ "

"No he doesn't," Ciel said again. "We're just friends."

The sounds of frustrated shrieking and a smack or two filled Ciel's earpiece, making him cringe. " _Yes he freaking_ does _, Phantom! He told me so._ "

Ciel's head popped up at that, smacking the bottom of the desk and making him glad he was wearing a helmet. "What!? When?"

" _The first night we met. I was trying to flirt with him until he explained he was interested in you._ "

"And you didn't tell me?"

" _Um, no. That would ruin it._ "

"Some friend you are," Ciel huffed, climbing up the side of a bookcase to plant a tiny camera in the corner.

" _Co-worker,_ " she corrected automatically. " _Looks like you don't have any friends: just co-workers and a poor neglected love interest._ "

Ciel groaned long and hard before walking back into the hall and down to the next room. "Snake?"

" _He's pretending he can't hear us right now,_ " Lizzy noted primly.

"Of course he is," Ciel muttered. Snake never got in the middle of their arguments. Snake was smart like that.

" _So?_ "

"So what?" Ciel grumbled, replacing a lamp over the last bug. He looked around, double checking his work.

" _So what are you going to do about it?_ "

"Do about what? I'm not responsible for his feelings."

" _Arg! Do you like him back?_ "

Ciel stopped in his tracks. "Now's not the time to talk about it. I'm busy."

" _You weren't too busy to talk about it when you brought it up two minutes ago._ "

Ciel didn't bother responding. He walked back down the hall and out onto the back terrace, re-locking the door behind him. He ducked behind a column, waiting for a break in the guard patrol.

" _Don't think you're getting out of this, mister. You're going to need to do something about it eventually._ " Ciel grunted. " _Fine. Just think about it, then. Pig head._ "

As much as Ciel fought not to think about it over the next few days, he couldn't help it. How _did_ he feel about Sebastian? The man was obviously a Grade A idiot with his love of cheesy superhero movies and that stupid Demon Crow, but he went out of his way to take care of Ciel and spend time with him. He was a genuinely good person. _And hella good-looking_ , a tiny voice piped up from the depths of Ciel's underused libido.

Tired of overanalyzing the situation, he resolved to handle it in traditional Ciel Phantomhive manner: with all the finesse of a mallet. His job was retrieval, after all.

"Do you want to have sex with me?"

Naturally, he chose to say this when Sebastian was chewing a big mouthful of salad with another forkful on the way up. You know, because of Ciel's natural sandpaper smoothness. The man in question sputtered, then choked, then coughed and beat his chest and downed a glass of water before gasping out a teary-eyed, " _WHAT?_ "

Ciel rolled his eyes at the dramatics. "Are you secretly lusting after me or not?" _Honestly, can't this guy eat lettuce without making an ordeal? How does he function?_

"Um," Sebastian hummed, face turning red. "I … like you?"

"Are you asking me or telling me?" Ciel asked, eyebrow raised.

"Telling?" he responded again with raised inflection.

Ciel sighed. "It's really not that hard of a question."

Sebastian closed his eyes and squared his shoulders, face tense. He took a deep breath and admitted, "Yes. I like you very much and I am sexually attracted to you." He sat rigid in his seat as if awaiting a firing squad.

"See, that wasn't so difficult." Ciel smirked into his water glass.

Sebastian cracked an eye open, clearly not expecting that response. "You … are okay with that?"

_Yep, new level of weirdness reached._ "Why wouldn't I be?"

Sebastian opened both eyes fully, relaxing a bit. "I thought you were uncomfortable with me because I'm gay." At Ciel's confused look, he explained: "The way you always keep as far away from me as possible and used to avoid me all the time. You only started tolerating my presence recently. I thought you were disgusted by my sexual preference."

Ciel's head was tilted a full 45 degrees in confusion. "How the hell was I supposed to know you're gay, moron? I avoided you because I hate people." _Thank god Lizzy isn't here to hear me admit that_.

Despite Ciel's harsh tone, Sebastian's eyes lit up. "You don't avoid me now."

Ciel grunted, "Obviously. You're not people; you're Sebastian." This was possibly the highest form of praise Ciel had ever bestowed upon another human being, something Sebastian clearly recognized. _A-a-and now he's got that big dumb smile on his face again. Honestly,_ Ciel thought with amusement.

"Does this mean you …?" Sebastian trailed off hopefully.

"Don't push it. I'm not good with this kind of thing but I don't _dis_ like you," Ciel allowed. He chewed his next words over and ground his teeth before admitting, "I've never been in a relationship so I'm not really comfortable with it." He cringed at the embarrassing honestly.

Sebastian just nodded. "Okay, how about we go slow then? If you _want_ to have one, that is?"

Ciel stared at him silently for a painfully long time before nodding once. "Alright. What are the parameters?"

Sebastian chuckled at Ciel's technical terminology. "No 'parameters,' we just do what feels right without rushing."

"That is disturbingly unspecific," Ciel grumbled, stabbing his food with a little frown. Sebastian smiled, reaching out to take Ciel's free hand. "Don't tell me, that 'felt right?'" The black-haired man nodded. "Fine. But don't think I'm going to go all mushy on you just because we're dating."

"I wouldn't expect anything else," Sebastian said happily, raising Ciel's hand to kiss his knuckles.

Ciel turned twelve shades of pink before muttering, "I would hit you for that, but with all those bruises I think you'd like it."

As to be expected, Lizzy was overjoyed and immediately began planning their wedding.

"Oh, for God's sake, woman, come off it. I only agreed to _try_ dating him. We haven't even kissed yet," Ciel snapped into his phone. He was once again spread eagled on his bed, staring intently at his ceiling.

" _You've never even thought about dating anyone before. For you, this practically is marriage!_ "

"I already regret telling you." He really didn't, though. He wanted to share tonight's story with someone even if this relationship couldn't go anywhere. How could it? He was a deep cover agent who would one day disappear without a trace, much less a goodbye.

" _Aw, Ciel. Cee-Cee. I'm happy for you._ "

Ciel cringed at the baby name. _Now_ he was starting to regret it. "Shut up. I just thought I should let you know so you'd stop harping on me all the time about talking to him. We talked. Situation resolved. You're welcome."

Lizzy puffed out a stream of air and changed the topic, " _The you-know-whats turned up a meeting between you-know-whos happening this weekend._ "

Ciel perked up. _This is the shit I do like!_ "Give me a time and place."

She huffed a laugh. " _Adrenaline junky. D.P. One, Friday, 8pm. It's going to take us a while to get you briefed and transported._ "

"Alright!"

\---

Ciel jerked his helmet on, still scowling despite gearing up for his favorite activity. Getting away from Sebastian had been like pulling teeth.

Ciel had rejected all forms of date-like activity tonight and informed the other man that he would be going out. This led to an entirely unnecessary train of questions about where and when and with whom and could Sebastian tag along that rubbed Ciel the wrong way until he snapped and stormed out. If getting away from the man had been difficult when he only had a crush, doing it while dating was shaping up to be near-impossible, a fact that made Ciel frown. Maybe this relationship was doomed before it even began.

Snake knocked on his helmet, startling Ciel back to attention. "This thing on?" the pale man asked, worried.

"Yeah! Sorry. I was thinking."

Snake nodded. "Get it all out now, because you're going to have to be on your toes. Tonight you're going to follow Azzuro to a warehouse where he's meeting someone from Chamber's Inc. Just hang up in the rafters and observe, no need to get involved. You're going to be our human camera today, according to Saber."

"Can't I just wait for him there? Hell, can't I just plant a camera and leave?"

Snake shook his head. "We don't know which one he's going to or if they'll stay there. They were careful not to say."

Ciel's lip quirked. He appreciated a crafty criminal. "Okay. Follow Azzurro, observe from above. Got it."

Snake gave him a final warning tap on his helmet. "And don't space out."

_And don't space out_ , Ciel grumbled from his spot in the rafters thirty minutes later. He had followed Azzurro deep into the warehouse district and inside one of the many nondescript buildings. He made sure his camera got a good look at the number outside before slinking in through one of the high windows to perch on a crossbeam. Azzurro paced the empty space, footsteps echoing as his guards fanned out along the walls, a few sticking close to their boss. _Aw, it's almost like he doesn't trust someone. Whatever happened to honor among thieves?_

Ciel's eyes nearly bugged out of their sockets when the Chamber's Inc. representative showed. "Redmond!" he shout-whispered into his helmet.

" _Wh-what? Like, Redmond your old flatmate, Redmond!?_ " Lizzy squeaked in his ear.

"Yes," Ciel hissed, glued to the action below.

"Edgar Redmond!" Azzurro called in a thick Italian accent, arms spread wide. "How unexpected. I thought you'd been disowned."

Redmond glared. "A misunderstanding. It's since been cleared up." He flipped his long, white-blond hair over his shoulder. "Uncle welcomed me back months ago."

Azzurro laughed heartily, ugly scarred face pulled in a wide smile. "How fortunate for you. Did you bring the goods?"

"That depends entirely on if you brought the money," Redmond responded coldly.

Azzurro gestured one of his guards forward and present a briefcase. One of Redmond's stepped up to take it, opening it to check the contents thoroughly before nodding and stepping back. "Bring them in," Redmond ordered.

Many things happened then. One of Redmond's guards walked out. A few more from either faction opened big sliding doors at either end of the warehouse, two trucks backed into the openings … and the bloody Demon Crow gingerly climbed onto the other end of Ciel's crossbeam from the opposite window, looking for all the world like a Great Dane trying to tiptoe across a balance beam. Ciel would have laughed if he weren't so close to crying. Fortunately, the great moron was too focused on the happenings below to notice Ciel, who was happy to keep it that way.

" _Don't move,_ " Lizzy whispered urgently into his ear.

"I see him," Ciel muttered back. The Demon Crow was perched in some ridiculously unstable gargoyle pose he undoubtedly picked up from a film, intently observing the trucks and probably pretending to be Batman.

"This batch is the finest yet. Fresh, tender, and oh-so-pretty," Redmond waxed poetically, pretty face lit with an inner glow. "Prime choices."

_What the hell is he on about?_ Ciel wondered. It sounded like he was selling fish. The last lock clicked off the Chamber's van and a guard reached in to pull out – a girl!? Ciel's eyes widened behind his helmet. Shit! This was a sale? "Lizzy," he breathed. He shouldn't be here. They needed an extraction team, or Black Ops, or _someone_ , anyone who was trained for this kind of thing, not some skinny intelligence-gatherer. His specialty was running away from fights, not into them.

" _Just stay put, Phantom. Don't move._ "

The sound of squeaking leather and grinding grit pulled his attention to the other end of the crossbeam. Double shit. This problem just went from bad to worse. The Crow was about to jump down and get himself (and probably a few girls) killed. Hell, with Ciel's luck a stray shot would hit him, too, and really make his night.

"Hey!" he called quietly, waving his arm to get the Crow's attention. Yes, ideally, he would have sat perfectly still and let the bad men take the girls, walked away untouched, and sent the proper team to rescue them later. However, that option was clearly out the window. He now had to stop the Demon Crow from fucking things up again, even if that meant bringing the fight to himself. Everything devolved into a fistfight with that lunatic.

The Crow squawked and spun, foot slipping, butt hitting the beam, hands wind milling before grabbing onto a support post. His legs now hung to either side of the beam as he stared stupidly at Ciel. "Watch–!"

"Shh!" Ciel interrupted him with a hiss. "Don't shout, you moron," he whispered, crawling closer to lower their chances of being overheard. He eyed the people below, but miraculously no one seemed to have heard the great dunderhead's cry.

"Sorry," the Crow whispered back, pulling his legs back up onto the beam to crouch. "We gotta do something."

_God save me from amateurs._ "Yeah. Let's stay real still and quiet and hope they don't shoot us."

The Demon Crow shoot his head, fists clenching. "I can't stand by while innocent people are hurt. With great power comes great responsibility."

Ciel turned his entire torso to face the Crow. "Did you seriously just quote Spiderman to me?" he asked incredulously. He held up a hand, forestalling an answer. "Don't bother. If you go down there, you'll just make it worse. Sit tight and let the professionals take care of it."

The Crow watched him with interest, cocking his head after a minute of Ciel not moving. "You're not doing anything."

"And I'm not going to. Those goons will start shooting if we go down there. You don't want one of the girls to get shot, do you?" The Crow ground his teeth, looking from Ciel to the girls and back. "Look, now's not the time. We'll get them later when it's safe."

"And what about what happens to them in the meantime? Don't you care about that?"

"Of course I freaking do, but I'm not going to risk their lives because I can't wait one bloody night for Extraction to rescue them properly," he spat, voice rising to a dangerous level. If he were closer, he would have jabbed his finger into the idiot's chest to drive his point home. Instead, he just folded his arms angrily and said more quietly, "Sit down, shut up, and try not to ruin this, too."

To his shock, the Crow did. "I'm sorry about what happened at Chamber's a few weeks ago," he offered quietly as they watched the girls get unloaded, examined, and reloaded onto the other truck. Ciel nodded silently. "I saw what was in your backpack. That's why I'm here; I've been looking into them since that night."

"Do you ever shut up?" Ciel sighed.

The Crow was silent for a good three minutes this time before continuing, "I'm just trying to say I know you're not a bad guy. Girl. Whatever." Ciel rolled his eyes, not responding. "Are you CIA?"

"Do I _sound_ like I'm CIA?" he asked, laying his London accent on thick. The Crow couldn't see Ciel's dirty look through the helmet, but Ciel trusted he could hear the scorn dripping from his words.

"No, I guess not," the Crow admitted, eyes glued to the last of the girls as she climbed into the truck. It was weird being this close to the vigilante without getting pummeled. Ciel shifted uncomfortably, side-eyeing him frequently.

Both trucks pulled out, leaving the remaining goons to close the warehouse back up. The tension started to drain from Ciel's shoulders. The girls were gone, the goons were trickling out. Things were looking up. When only eight bodyguards and the two criminals they were guarding remained, the Crow shouted, "Now's our chance!" and swung down to ground level on a rope he had somehow managed to tie without Ciel noticing.

Ciel stared after him dumbfounded, wondering exactly what he did in a past life that was horrible enough to warrant this kind of punishment.

The Demon crow crashed into a cluster of thugs, knees and elbows flailing, shouting a ridiculous battle cry. _What the hell is that moron trying to accomplish?_ Ciel wondered.

" _Keep your butt planted,_ " Elizabeth warned through his headset.

"Trust me, I plan to," Ciel muttered. He had no desire to get in the middle of … _that_. Whatever _that_ was. He watched curiously as the tangle of bodies pulsed and rolled, knocking more men down and sucking them into the fray. It was pure insanity. The two different groups and the Crow all seemed to be kicking and hitting indiscriminately. His amusement was cut short when a gunshot rang out, making Ciel jump and look around.

"Don't do that!" Redmond shouted, knocking Azzurro's hand down. "You'll hit your own men."

"They know what they signed up for," Azzurro snarled, glaring when Redmond knocked his hand down a second time and pulled his own weapon.

"Savage," he spat, pointing his gun at the Italian. "Don't you dare shoot at my men." The two bosses faced off, glaring daggers.

"He came from up there!" a distant guard called, pointing at the Crow's rope. "Hey, there's another one!" Bullets immediately whizzed by Ciel, making him drop to his belly and shimmy toward the window. The cluster of guards around the Demon Crow suddenly remembered they had firearms as well and shots rang out from that quarter, too. Ciel froze for a second, torn.

" _Move!_ " Elizabeth screeched. " _Get out of there!_ "

She was right. There was nothing he could do for the Crow now. Ciel had a little .22 on him, but there's no way he was going to win a firefight at this distance with ten small rounds. Damnit, he was just supposed to watch, not engage. A lance of fire skewered his side, making him wobble and almost fall off the beam. He crashed down chest-first, clinging on for dear life. Another shot grazed through the meaty part of his thigh, but he was too stunned to move.

"Got him! He's down. Let's get out of here before the cops show up."

He must have looked dead to the men below, Ciel realized. A small part of him found the energy to be grateful that they didn't bother to climb all the way up to check.

" _Ciel!_ " Lizzy was screaming in his helmet through a thick layer of static, all code names and protocol forgotten. " _Ciel! Say something! We're sending someone after you, just hang on_."

Ciel was too focused on breathing to respond. Damn, it hurt. He'd never been shot before, not really shot. The graze two weeks ago was the closest he'd ever come. This was so much worse. He knew he should be applying pressure or checking the wound or something, but his body felt so heavy.

Footsteps approached, making him close his eyes in resignation. _So this is how I go. It could be worse._ He didn't even tense for the shot he knew was coming – surprised when instead he felt two strong hands lifting him. The American-accented voice he hated so much murmured, "I gotcha, little buddy." The Crow pulled him to the window and eased them down outside, laying Ciel on the ground to examine his wounds.

"Don't," Ciel breathed, weakly batting at his hands.

"They got you pretty good, huh," the Crow noted, prodding at this side. "It doesn't look too bad, though. Come on, I'll patch you up." With that, he hefted Ciel over his shoulder and started carrying him, probably walking to a car. Being upside-down put pressure on his wound and made the blood rush to Ciel's head. Black fuzzies started swirling in his vision and he battled the urge to puke.

"Put," he gasped, "me," gasp, "down."

"Almost there," was the last thing Ciel heard until he felt himself floating back to consciousness, a familiar scent in his nose. Wait - was this his sofa? He was on his own sofa!? Why was he at home? This didn't make any sense. Ciel flailed, pushing himself up and almost puking in his helmet when the wound in his side flared. "Gahh!" he cried out involuntarily.

"It's okay, I'm here! Calm down," a soothing voice called from Sebastian's room.

Oh, no. This was not good. This was the opposite of good. Shit, fuck, and damn, he was in his blasted suit in the middle of his living room and Sebastian was home. Curse that Crow! "Sebastian! No! Don't come out here!" he shouted, frantically looking around for a blanket to pull over himself. He had just thrown it over his body when he realized his goddamn helmet was still on. Fumbling, he fought to free his arms as footsteps approached.

The Demon Crow walked around the corner, head tilted quizzically. "Um, how do you know my name?"

Ciel watched in horror as the big bloody birdbrained bane of his existence pulled off his cloth mask to reveal the confused face of his new boyfriend. Suddenly, Ciel wished the bullet had hit him a little higher.


	5. Chapter 5

"What the fuck!" Ciel demanded, voice squeaking in his rage.

Sebastian lifted both hands in a gesture of surrender. "It's okay! I just brought you to my place to patch you up. I'm not going to hurt you, I swear. We're not enemies anymore, right?"

"You brought a stranger in a mask to your actual house? Are you brain-dead or something?" Ciel shifted, pulling himself into a more upright position in the corner of the couch.

Frowning, Sebastian crossed his arms. "You answer mine first: How do you know my name?"

For one glorious moment, Ciel imagined jumping up and darting out into the night. The disturbing amount of wet, sticky blood making his suit cling to his skin cut that fantasy short. He was going nowhere until that hole was properly patched. He placed his head in his hand, forestalling the inevitable for a few seconds longer before lifting his helmet off.

"Ciel!?" Sebastian cried, jumping a step back. It was strange watching him speak in an American accent. Ciel's lip quirked, knowing Sebastian would probably feel the same about hearing him speak in his natural British one.

"I knew you were an imitation Brit," he said smugly, not disappointed at all when Sebastian gaped like a fish.

"You're Watchdog?" Sebastian asked stupidly. "But you're not a girl!"

Ciel rolled his eyes. "Questions later, I'm bleeding out over here." That made him shut his mouth. Without another word, Sebastian fell to the floor and opened the First Aid kit. He prodded at Ciel's suit for a second before pulling out a pair of medical shears to cut it away. "Don't waste your time. It's armored. Help me unzip it." Ciel did his best to lever himself up off the couch so Sebastian could undress him. They let the top half of the suit flop at his waist for now.

"This might sting a little," Sebastian warned, preparing to disinfect the hole.

"I just got shot, you dope," Ciel said without much venom, staying still so Sebastian could work.

"It's not bad," Sebastian assessed. "It doesn't look like it hit anything major, just a little fat."

"I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that," Ciel sniffed in faux offense, making both of them smile. When Sebastian finished stitching, Ciel added, "There's one on my leg, too." Sebastian nodded and helped him unclip his belt and peel the suit down further, leaving him in just his black boxer-briefs. Ciel was relieved to see it was just a graze. It was a deeper graze than the last one, but a graze nonetheless. Sebastian started at it oddly for a second before patching it up, too.

"So, that wasn't a dumpster scrape two weeks ago, was it," he stated more than asked.

Prepared for the question, Ciel admitted, "Nope. A Kong-Rong shot me."

Sebastian's eyes widened at the admission. "Oh," he said in a small voice. He tucked the blanket around Ciel and gathered up the trash and kit, taking both into the bathroom. He stopped in the kitchen on the way back, pouring a glass of orange juice and grabbing a bag of sugar cookies, both of which he extended to Ciel along with some painkillers. "Here, you've lost a good amount of blood."

Ciel nodded his thanks, drinking and chewing in silence for a minute. Sebastian watched him intently from the end of the couch. "You might as well ask," Ciel said with feigned indifference, "it's not like I can go anywhere right now."

Sebastian nodded, prompting, "So, you're Watchdog?"

Ciel rolled his eyes. "No, I'm Phantom. My team is The Queen's Watchdog."

Sebastian's lips made a little **O** of understanding. "So that's why you didn't have a **W** on your costume," he said, nodding.

"Tch, I don't have an initial on my _suit_ ," he said emphatically, "because I'm a _spy_ , not a hero."

Brows furrowed, Sebastian asked worriedly, "A spy?" The big squishy dope looked like someone had kicked a puppy.

"Oh, don't give me that face. I'm not here to start trouble or mess with your country or anything; I'm just trying to stop human traffickers." In an undertone, he added, "Which would have been a lot easier without you getting underfoot all the time." He bit into a cookie violently, letting some of his frustration out on it.

Sebastian winced. "Who are you spying for?" Ciel gave him the dirtiest look yet and continued eating. "Dumb question," Sebastian admitted. "But why are you here? Shouldn't the US government be handling this?"

Ciel rolled his eyes. "I don't even _have_ that information to prevent situations exactly like this. I come, I retrieve information, and I go the hell home. That's my job. I don't plan, examine, or engage, just retrieve." With a pointed look, he added, "Unless you show up and beat the tar out of me for no reason, of course."

Sebastian grimaced. "I really am sorry about all that. I thought you were a thief until that last time."

"Technically, I am," Ciel countered archly, waggling his eyebrows and making Sebastian smile.

"So you don't … hate me?" Sebastian asked, nervously.

Ciel scoffed. "Of course I don't, you big stupid lump." Sebastian grinned broadly at that. "I do think you should learn to butt out, though," he muttered, finishing his orange juice and extending the empty cup for Sebastian to place on the coffee table.

A loud banging sounded on the door, making both men jump. "Please, God, tell me you did not lead the bad guys back to our home," Ciel muttered in pure exasperation.

"Ciel, are you in there?" Lizzy called through the door, letting Sebastian off the hook. She turned the handle and it opened, making Ciel shoot daggers at Sebastian anyway for not locking the damn thing. "Oh, hey Sebastian," she said cheerily. "What are you guys up… to…? Um, what are you wearing?" Her eyes widened to comical proportions as she noticed Ciel's helmet on the floor and looked at Sebastian's grown-man onesie closer. "Holy shitballs!" She walked forward with her jaw dragging the floor. Snake followed after, closing the door. "You're the freaking Demon Crow!" Lizzy shouted, pointing at Sebastian's chest. Snake simply sized up the situation, said "Hey" quietly, and sat in the recliner as if completely unaffected by the drama unfolding around him.

"Hush, Lizzy," Ciel admonished.

"Did you _know?_ " she demanded.

Ciel laughed, immediately pressing a hand to his side. "Don't make me do that again." He sucked in a few breaths before adding, "No. Not until he dragged me home like a caveman tonight. What are you guys doing here?"

"We followed your GPS," Snake noted, pointing at the helmet. "Comms seem to be broken though." With a mild frown, he scooped it up to examine it.

Sebastian watched the exchange intently. "So, you're his team?"

"Ugh!" Lizzy huffed. " _Ciel_ , did you tell him everything?"

Smirking, Ciel responded, "No. But by all means keep letting things slip yourself."

Lizzy clapped a hand to her mouth. "Poop."

Sebastian laughed. "You are too cute, Elizabeth. He's lucky to have you on his team."

"Okay, I like him. He can stay," she declared, pleased. Ciel just rolled his eyes. "Seriously, though, are you okay? We were so worried!"

Ciel nodded. "I'm good. Numb Nuts here patched me up."

"You can't talk about your boyfriend like that!" she gasped, turning to Sebastian to say, "He doesn't mean it; he's just a little warped in the brain. We've tried our best to fix him but nothing has worked."

Sebastian laughed again and patted Ciel's non-injured leg. "I know, but I love him anyway." Ciel made a face at them, before murdering another cookie.

"Not to be rude, but why do you have an American accent?" Lizzy asked, tilting her head.

"Because I'm American," Sebastian explained with a smirk. "I faked the other one for cover."

Ciel lifted a brow. "You faked an accent and called it 'cover?' Please."

"Didn't you do the same?"

Ciel snorted. "No, _I_ faked an entire freaking _life_. Birth certificate, school credits, job and flatmate I don't need. The accent was just part of the package deal."

"Still, it kept you from realizing I was the Crow, didn't it? You who spoke to both sides of me more than anyone else?" Sebastian pointed out smugly, making Ciel grumble about bad imitations and piss-poor plans.

Snake let out a low whistle, drawing everyone's attention. "You had a close one."

"I got shot. Much closer and I wouldn't be here," Ciel complained, hand on his side.

Snake held up his helmet, tracing a crack with his finger. "One grazed your helmet, too." Elizabeth squeaked at his words, clapping her hands to her face and looking at Ciel with teary eyes. She moved to rise, an action abruptly halted by Ciel's words.

"I swear to fuck I will shoot you if you try to hug me right now," he warned. "My painkillers have yet to kick in and my side is killing me." Elizabeth fumed, Sebastian comforted her with meaningless shushing noises, Snake prodded the broken tech while tsking, and Ciel stared at the ceiling wishing they'd all do it somewhere else.

Snake snickered softly when everyone calmed down. "First Redmond and now Michaelis. We really need to start running background checks on your flatmates."

"Oh, get stuffed."

"That's actually a pretty good idea," Lizzy mused. "Who knew you were such a trouble magnet?"

"Redmond?" Sebastian asked curiously.

"The blond pretty boy representative from Chamber's Inc. tonight," Ciel explained. "Tea-bathing loon."

"Don't ask," Snake advised at Sebastian's look. "He lived with Ciel one – or was it two? – people ago. He said he's the nephew of someone important at Chamber's."

"You really _do_ know how to pick them," Sebastian noted with amusement.

"Shut it, birdbrain. I can't help that other people are full of suck."

"If he's that important, why'd he live here and not somewhere nice?" Sebastian asked.

"Hey!"

Ignoring him, Snake shrugged and said, "They had a temporary falling-out of some sort."

"I'm sure H.Q. knows," Lizzy mused, twirling a strand of blonde hair.

"Ugh, who cares," Ciel groaned. "I'm exhausted. Let's talk about it tomorrow. Hey," he pointed at Sebastian, "if you want to keep your boyfriend status, get your giant ass over here and carry me to bed." Sebastian leapt immediately to his feet to obey. "And if you throw me over your shoulder again, I'll shoot you, too," Ciel added sourly.

He was out the second his head hit the pillow. It felt like he had only just closed his eyes when he woke up to bright light shining in the window and sounds of friendly chatter filtering in from outside his door. Ciel winced, aching even more than he had last night. It was too bright in here for morning. What time was it anyway? He groaned when the clock display read 11:30, too tired to even do the math of how much sleep he got. It wasn't enough. Someone, likely Sebastian, had set a glass of water and a dose of painkillers by his alarm clock, so he took them and resolved to stay in bed until he felt ready to move. He might have drifted back off for a bit because the next time the glanced at his clock, it was 12:30 and his wounds ached less. Breathing un-nice things as he shuffled into his bathroom, he cleaned himself up and pulled on some loose, stretchy clothes before heading out into the den.

"Ciel!" Elizabeth shouted.

"Nope." He shuffled past her, heading straight to the kitchen.

"Ciel," she whined.

"I can't hear you until after I have tea."

Snake snickered, spread out on one end of the table, tinkering with his helmet and a pile of tiny tools. Sebastian loomed over his shoulder holding a packet of papers and murmuring instructions. Lizzy pouted from the recliner, tapping her phone screen as she sulked.

Ciel brewed his tea and drank it in silence, leaning against the kitchen counter and watching the others work. Feeling sufficiently alive at last, he made a second cup and joined Snake at the table. "Lizzy. Team meeting." She nodded, clicking her phone off and joining them at the table on Snake's other side, expression serious. "Sebastian? Give us a minute?" Ciel requested. The large man looked like he wanted to argue, but closed his mouth and nodded without speaking.

"I think he should stay," Snake said, surprising Ciel. Snake rarely got involved in conflict and even more rarely contradicted anyone.

Lizzy looked at the albino curiously for a second before nodding. "That's a good idea. We are going to be talking about him, after all."

Ciel sighed. "Fine, so long as he doesn't interrupt." Sebastian silently held up a Boy Scout salute before sitting in the last open chair, across from Snake. "Well, since we all know what this discussion is about, let's jump right into it. Protocol says Sebastian is a danger to the team and we should immediately dispose of him." Sebastian's eyes widened, but he held his silence as promised. "Seeing as neither of you have brought it up – or carried it out while I was asleep – I trust this means it's off the table." They both nodded. "Good. As for myself, I say we swear him to secrecy, avoid any future contact, and never speak about this again. Lizzy?"

"Um," she looked between Sebastian and the others. "I like him."

"That's not the question. Personal emotions aside, what do you think we should do in regards to the _team_?"

She sighed and bowed her head. "I don't want to kill him and I don't think he'd hurt us, so I guess all we can do is trust him with our secret and cut him out of our lives, for everyone's sake." Sebastian swallowed thickly at her words, looking at Ciel who wouldn't meet his eyes.

Snake?"

"I vote he stays and helps. He's useful."

Startled, Ciel eyed Snake like he'd grown a second head. "I'm sorry, but are we talking about the same Sebastian? Like, the grown-ass man in a spandex onesie who got me shot last night?"

Snake ignored his tone and held up the helmet. "He figured out a way to fix it. I was ready to scrap it, but he's an engineering genius. Just think about what he can do with the rest of your gear."

Ciel finally looked over at Sebastian, who shrugged. "I have a Master's of Engineering. R and D, remember?"

Overlooking this minor breech of the no-talking rule, Ciel just nodded and turned back to Snake. "So you want him to join our team? How would we possibly explain that to the boss?"

"We wouldn't," Snake said simply. "He's not here and he won't know unless we tell him. Besides, Sebastian has been working the same case we are and he arrived at the same meetup from a different angle. I think his insight might help us finish this."

"And I do have the files you need," Sebastian added quietly, ducking down a bit as soon as the words left his mouth, afraid he'd get kicked out for speaking again.

Ciel interlaced his fingers and propped his chin on his hands, thinking. He ran his eyes over the others, meeting Snake's steadfast golden gaze, Lizzy's hopeful smile, and Sebastian's pleading expression. He let out a big breath before allowing, "Fine – but with conditions. One, and this is the most important: We cannot under any circumstances let official channels find out about this. Ever. Other agents will have no qualms doing what we could not." He stared each person down until they nodded. "Two: We don't tell him any more than absolutely necessary. As it is, we would all probably go down for treason if anyone finds out about him; let's not make it any worse than it already is." Again, everyone nodded. "Three: He doesn't go into the field. I'm tired of having my hard work fucked up by an amateur, well-meaning or not." Lizzy and Snake nodded immediately. It took an additional stare-down before Sebastian did as well. Still holding his gaze, Ciel impulsively added, "And four: You do exactly what I say, when I say. I am team captain and you will follow my every order fully and without fail or this deal is off before it even begins."

Sebastian nodded, making Lizzy clap and Snake smile.

Ciel rolled his eyes. "I can't believe you're all so happy about this."

"I'll go get the files," Sebastian offered, placing a hand on Ciel's shoulder as he walked by.

"You kept them _here_!?" Ciel shouted, making the others laugh.

"This really is too funny," Snake noted quietly, eyes back on the helmet he was tinkering with. Ciel made an ugly face at him, not amused at all. Sebastian returned with a thick stack of Manilla file folders. He broke them into two stacks. "This one lists what I believe are his actual customers; this other one looks similar but none of the names panned out."

Elizabeth pawed through them quickly, nodding. "Snake was right; you are good!" She stuffed her phone into her pocket and scooped up everything. "I'm going to get these to H.Q. right away."

Ciel grabbed her wrist, stopping her. "Wait. You can't do that yet." She cocked her head.

"Where would you say you got them?" Snake added without looking up, obviously fully aware of events around him despite appearing to be engrossed in his tinkering. Lizzy plopped back down, frowning.

"We need to fake a mission to explain where they came from," Ciel suggested. "Create a plausible explanation other than 'they just fell out of the sky.'" The others nodded, each staring down at the table thoughtfully.

After a few minutes of silence, Sebastian piped up with, "I have a plan."

"Is it a _good_ one?"

"I have a plan," he repeated.

Ciel rolled his eyes. "Here we go."

Sebastian's plan wasn't actually terrible, as much as Ciel wanted to bitch about it. The most logical place for the CEO of Chamber's Inc. to store damning evidence was under as much protection as humanly possible. He wouldn't trust a flunky or business associate with something so valuable; he'd want to take care of it himself. Bank security boxes were obviously out of the question, so that left only one possible location once his office was out of the equation: his own home. Naturally, having trained in the elite academy of Hollywood action flicks, Sebastian expected it would be locked up in a big, bad literal vault room under the villain's dark and evil mansion, an assumption that made Ciel laugh.

"This is why you don't get to go into the field," he noted. "Lizzy?"

"On it." She walked out without further ado to get things set up. If they could pull everything together, they could make it look like they'd executed a textbook perfect break-in tonight without moving a muscle, which was perfect by Ciel's book. No matter how many painkillers he sucked down, his bullet wound _hurt_.

"So, who all knows you're the Crow?" Ciel asked.

"Just Bard. He helps me out sometimes."

Ciel was relieved the list was so small. "Good, that will make this order real simple: You can't tell him about our team."

"I figured as much."

Ciel looked at him hard. "I mean it. You can't tell him you're helping us, you can't let it slip that we're helping you, nothing. In fact, it would be best if he thinks I don't even know about your nighttime activities."

"I got it. I can't tell Bard." Sebastian placed a large hand over Ciel's on the table. "I know this is stressful for you, but I promise I won't do anything to hurt you or your team. No matter what you may think of me, I am actually pretty smart."

Snake snorted. "You can just give up on that one right now. Ciel thinks everyone else is stupid; it's like an endearing character flaw that makes you want to beat him until you feel better." Ciel stuck out his tongue. He liked it better when Snake didn't pick sides.

Sebastian ran a hand over Ciel's hair and leaned in to kiss the top of his head. "I know all about this adorable little spitfire."

"Gah!" Ciel jumped up, rubbing a hand over his head. "You can't just _do_ that!"

Snake laughed so hard he could barely breathe. "The look … on your face! Haha! You should have gotten a boyfriend ages ago!"

Ciel glared, face hot and red. "I'm going to get some sleep. Wake me up when Lizzy gets back." He stormed off without waiting for a response, letting his embarrassment out by slamming his bedroom door. _Assholes, the lot of them._ He curled up in a ball, injured side up, fuming. Not too long later, his door creaked open and someone walked in. The bed dipped behind him and he tensed.

"I'm sorry if I embarrassed you," Sebastian murmured, big hand wrapping around Ciel's shoulder.

"Hmph," Ciel grunted, not bothering to turn around. The lack of a tirade was practically a parade of acceptance by Ciel-standards, so Sebastian laid down next to him, curling against his back and wrapping an arm around the smaller man's chest. Ciel immediately tensed, worried about the open door. "Snake –"

"Left. He didn't say where he was going."

Ciel relaxed slightly. "What are you doing?"

"Cuddling. Want me to stop?" Ciel shook his head. Sebastian leaned down to kiss his ear, smiling at the little shiver it sent up Ciel's spine. He squirmed closer, putting his chin on top of the soft gray head. The smaller body relaxed comfortably against his chest. "This is nice."

Ciel hummed in agreement. "I'm glad I didn't kill you."

Sebastian snorted a laugh. "Me too." Grinning mischievously, he rolled Ciel onto his back and added, "If you had, I wouldn't be able to do this." He leaned down suddenly and pressed their lips together, making Ciel's eyes pop open wide. After a few stunned seconds he responded, lowering his eyelids and moving his lips in kind. It was surprisingly nice and Ciel found himself moaning into Sebastian's mouth when the black-haired man deepened it, hands rising to clutch the bigger man's shirt. Sebastian lifted his hand to rest along Ciel's jaw, craving more contact. Without thinking, he moved to crawl on top of the soft, inviting body next to him and in doing so discovered the meaning of the word "pain."

Ciel shrieked at an ear-splitting volume, simultaneously punching Sebastian in the nose and kneeing him in the goods. Sebastian fell off to the side, rolling clear off the bed and onto the floor where he was content to curl up into a ball of hurt. Ciel lay panting on the bed, hands holding his injured side. "Jesus fuck, you motherfucker," he ranted, letting off an impressive stream of expletives until he calmed down.

"Ow," Sebastian moaned quietly.

"Ow yourself, dickwad," Ciel snarled, peeling up his shirt to see fresh blood leaking through the bandage, which he lifted to find a few popped threads. "Great, you ripped my bloody stitches open." He snatched a pillow and threw it with as much force as he could muster at where he suspected Sebastian had landed.

"You sank my battleship," Sebastian gasped, making Ciel smile. Both men stayed where they were for a bit longer, regaining their composure. Sebastian was the first to recover, pulling himself over the edge of the bed and returning Ciel's pillow. "Let me see it." He examined the popped threads and murmured, "I'll fix it. Be right back."

"You better," Ciel huffed. _Honestly, the man is menace in every way. I genuinely do not understand why Snake wants him around. Unless it's for kissing. God that man can kiss._ Ciel's face immediately flushed scarlet at the unexpected thought. Well, maybe Sebastian wasn't _all_ bad. Ciel slapped his hands over his face, trying to calm down before Sebastian could see him in this flustered state.

"Ciel?"

_Fuck._

A cool palm touched his wrist but he refused to move his hand. "Are you okay?"

Ciel nodded. "Just do it, already."

Steady fingers wiped the area clean with an alcohol-soaked cotton ball. He felt the disturbingly familiar pinch-pull of stitches being put in. "Just two," Sebastian noted, finished in no time. Ciel uncovered his eyes enough to watch him press on a fresh square bandage and place a gentle kiss over it.

"Don't start that again," Ciel warned.

"I'll risk it." Sebastian pulled off his bloody gloves, tossing them and the other trash into Ciel's bathroom bin before returning to pet his head. "I really am sorry for all this. It's my fault you got shot."

"Yes, it is," Ciel agreed.

"Ouch, you could at least lie about it."

Ciel rolled his eyes, catching the big hand in both of his to lay a kiss on it. "Stupid. I forgive you. Just don't do it again."

"How can I? I'm not allowed in the field, remember?" Sebastian smirked, perching on the edge of the bed.

"Oh, you'll find a way. I know you will," Ciel muttered, scooting closer to pull him down and curl against Sebastian's chest. "Just hold me and shut up so I can sleep already."

"Yes, sir," Sebastian rumbled, cradling the smaller form to him and preening like he won the damn lottery or something. Moron.

Ciel awoke for the second time that day to the sound of voices outside his door. His wound burned twice as strongly from its recent tear, making him hiss and glare futilely at the ceiling. A quick glance at his nightstand revealed some curious new round pills with the note: "I brought the good stuff! –xoxo- Lizzy" Ciel always knew she was his favorite. He chewed and swallowed the medicine exactly like you're not supposed to, not even bothering with water. Without waiting for it to kick in, he shuffled out into the den.

Snake, Lizzy, and Sebastian were crowded around one end of the table, staring at a set of laptops; Ciel's newly repaired helmet sat in the center of the table in front of them. "What are you up to?"

"Redirecting your GEO tags to make it look like you're actually at the Chamber's mansion right now," Lizzy answered for Snake, who was typing.

Ciel nodded, slumping into a chair. "Sebastian, this is an order." The large man stood up straight, looking serious. "Make me tea." Lizzy snickered. Sebastian just nodded like it was the most important job ever and immediately leapt to it.

"It's good you came out when you did, we need you for this next part." The pretty blonde slid a stack of paper across the table to Ciel, who examined it quizzically, jaw dropping further and further in horror as he read. "It's your script –"

"No."

"Sebastian wrote it –"

"I see that."

"You need to read it into your helmet so we'll have audio data like we would on a real job."

"I'm not reading it." Ciel's eyes were drawn to the overly dramatic words – half of which he swore were straight out of that failed _Catwoman_ movie. Without further ado, he walked straight to the tiny balcony off the back of the living room, lit the heinous thing on fire, and dropped it to the concrete where he left it to burn. He returned to find a sour looking Sebastian sliding twenty dollars to a smug Lizzy.

"Told you that's what he'd do." Without pausing, she lifted another copy of the vile script from her lap and set it in front of Ciel, who glared, not touching it. "Just read it."

"No. Leave the comms open for that amount of time and say the data got corrupted if anyone asks. Or better yet, fake _all_ of the time markers like you're doing with the GEO tags."

A sour Lizzy pushed the twenty dollar bill to a smug Snake. "Told you he was too smart for you two," the golden-eyed man noted distractedly, eyes on his screen. On second thought, Ciel always knew Snake was his favorite. The pale man leaned back, cracking his knuckles. "And now we wait. Gotta give it some time to make it look like you're moving around in there."

"Why don't you fake it, like he said for the other thing?" Sebastian asked, ferrying Ciel's properly steeped tea from kitchen to table.

Snake shrugged. "Easier just to sit for a minute than do all that typing." Lizzy, who was stuck doing 'all that typing' for Ciel's forty minutes worth of comms, blew a jealous raspberry at him. Ciel sipped his tea in amused silence, watching the others work. Sebastian stood quietly by his side and placed an arm around his shoulder. Faking a mission was one of the more ridiculous things they'd done (honestly, it's not like anyone ever _checked_ the damn logs), but if half an hour of light effort would provide a little insurance to protect Sebastian, it was worth it.

The minutes ticked by, Snake occasionally tapping or jiggling something. Lizzy finished her part with satisfied "All done!" It was another fifteen minutes before Snake declared it good enough, now making it look like Ciel was returning to a Drop Point like he normally would after a mission. "And we're done!" he declared, closing his laptop.

Ciel nodded in approval, head feeling comfortably warm and fuzzy from the narcotics. "Good job, guys. Lizzy, go get those files to H.Q. like you would after a real job." She nodded, scooping up her stuff and heading out. "Snake, take my busted suit with you and patch it up the best you can. I still have my backup one here." Snake nodded as well, stuffing his tech and Ciel's suit into a duffle bag, saluting on his way out the door. "Sebastian, cook something. I haven't eaten all day." The tall man bent down to kiss the top of his head before heading obediently into the kitchen. "It's good to be king," Ciel muttered to the empty table.

\---

Things went smoothly long enough for Ciel's stitches to come out. No one questioned where the files came from and Lizzy and Snake took turns completing Ciel's day job remotely as he convalesced so no one would suspect anything amiss. He wasn't looking forward to the impending monthly office meeting, but there was nothing to be done about it so he resolved to burn that bridge when he came to it.

Ciel was munching happily on his well-deserved Post-Stitches-Removal cupcake when Lizzy called.

" _We've got a problem_."

"Solving problems is our job," Ciel pointed out through a mouthful of chocolate cake and frosting.

" _Father's coming._ "

Ciel choked, coughing out wet gobs of cake as Sebastian patted his back. "What! Why?"

Lizzy sounded close to tears. " _Because we did such a good job breaking into Chamber's mansion. He wants us to lead a wetworks team in there so they can finish the job,_ " she explained miserably. " _He's coming to oversee the operation personally_."

"Fuck," Ciel stated simply, staring off into the distance. Ciel had only met Baron Kelvin once, right after he was recruited. The man gave him the heebie-jeebies, but that was probably because he had power over so many deadly people; it made Ciel's hair stand on end. Thankfully, the Baron almost never got involved in field work, preferring to delegate the actual work and let orders trickle down through channels. To have him here … Ciel shuddered. He would have been nervous around his boss on his best day but that fear didn't hold a candle to the abject terror of doing it surrounded by assassins, caught flatfooted in a lie and breaking the rules by letting a foreign civilian hang around to learn government secrets.

" _We're gonna die!_ " Lizzy wailed, finally breaking down into tears.

The sound galvanized Ciel. "Lizzy. Lizzy! We are _not_ going to die. When will he be here?"

" _Um_ ," typing, " _The day after tomorrow_."

Ciel nodded fiercely. "Good. He probably won't want to see us until at least the day after he gets settled in. That means we have almost three days to work out a viable infiltration plan. We already did the research when we faked it, right? Now we just have to find a way to put it all into action. We'll go over the details with a fine tooth comb and stay awake until he's banging on my door if we have to."

Elizabeth's sobs wound down into shaky breaths. " _Okay. Okay, yeah. We can do this_ ," she said, working herself up. " _Thanks, Ciel. We'll be over tonight to hammer things out._ "

"Right. Just keep your cool."

Sebastian looked at Ciel curiously after he hung up. "What's wrong?"

Ciel rubbed his temples, feeling a headache coming on. "Now we have to _really_ break into Chamber's house or our boss is going to kill us. Literally."


	6. Chapter 6

Ciel called out of work for the next two days straight and missed the department meeting, consequences be damned. He knew William T. Spears was probably calling for his head on a platter at this very moment but he couldn't bring himself to care when the actual Sword of Damocles was dangling over him. He and his team (plus Sebastian) worked around the clock, taking short catnaps on the couch as necessary and running Sebastian's fancy coffee machine into the ground. At the end of the third night, they had what looked to be a viable plan that fit reasonably well within the bounds of their fake mission's parameters. Any inconsistencies could be explained away by a change in guard pattern or daily routine.

"More coffee?" Sebastian offered.

Lizzy, slumped over the table with her messy blonde head resting on her arms, growled an unladylike, " _Fuck_ coffee. I'm sleeping until the world ends."

"Or until Kelvin gets here," Snake prompted.

"Same thing."

"Kelvin?" Sebastian asked.

Ciel chucked a wadded up paper at Snake's head halfheartedly. "Way to go, fucktard. It's not like you're a spy or anything."

Snake didn't even flinch when it hit his face. "We're exhausted and he's not human for being alert on so little sleep. Cut me some slack."

Ciel grumbled incoherently, too tired to argue. "Lizzy, you can have my bed." She made an inhuman noise, not moving. "Snake, you've got the couch." He nodded, shuffling over immediately. "I'm taking Sebastian's bed." What spoke the loudest about their exhaustion was the fact that no one had the energy to razz him for that declaration. Yet.

Waking up with Sebastian draped over him was new, but not altogether unpleasant. Ciel took a moment to stroke the man's shaggy black hair, pushing it off his peaceful face. Strong arms wrapped tighter around Ciel, pulling him closer like a teddy bear. "Hey," the smaller man said, frowning and tapping him sharply on the top of the head. "Leggo."

"Nuh-uh," Sebastian grunted, nuzzling his face into Ciel's sternum.

Ciel let him snuggle for a few minutes before announcing: "I can kill you with my bare hands. Geddoff."

"No you can't; you're just information retrieval." Sebastian planted a sweet kiss on his neck before ducking his head back down.

Ciel huffed a laugh. "I already regret telling you that. Now seriously, move before I order you."

Sebastian gave him one last squeeze before backing off. Ciel was about to announce his intention to check in with Lizzy when she knocked on the door. "Are you guys doing the butt sex?"

Ciel threw a pillow at the door. " _No_ , we are not 'doing the butt sex,'" he shouted with scorn. "God! You obnoxious teenage girl!"

"Not right now, anyway" Sebastian added mischievously.

"Sebastian!"

Lizzy pushed open the door, giggling. "I needed that." She scooped up the pillow and held it to her chest. "I already sent the plans to Bar – _Father's_ team. They're going to look over them today." She chewed her lip.

"Don't worry, we did a good job on those, Lizzy," Ciel noted. "The worst thing they can do now is tell us we got lucky if they discover a problem." The tension between her brows eased a bit and she nodded. Without warning, Sebastian reached out and grabbed her, tugging Lizzy in between them for a bear hug. She squealed happily and didn't fight it. Ciel scooted further to the edge of the bed and safety. "Yeah. Watch out, he's a hugger," he noted a little belatedly.

"I don't mind!" she gasped.

Ciel rolled his eyes. "Where's Snake?"

"He left really early, snuck out before anyone woke up," Elizabeth said, face pressed into Sebastian's chest. This fact cemented in Ciel's mind the belief that Snake was far smarter than the rest of them. Following Snake's lead, he crawled off the bed and escaped into Sebastian's bathroom for a few minutes alone.

The plans were good, if Ciel said so himself. The Baron would have no reason to doubt they had faked the mission in the first place – and really, why _would_ they? It would be completely insane for a team tasked with stealing files to fake an entire elaborate mission that ended in them achieving their objective. No one would immediately jump to the conclusion that their retarded-ass spy moved in with the city's hero, blew his own deep cover, started dating said hero, and brought him into their super-secret espionage team. Now _that_ would be crazy.

Ciel glared at his reflection. "Stupid," he told himself firmly. "You are the dumbest of them all."

\---

Ciel crouched in a tree outside Aleistor Chamber's manor/mansion/personal hotel. It was obscenely large and all white, just like his office building. Ciel hated the man on principle for making the spoils of such dark and disgusting work look so clean and pretty. Inside the glittering windows, a party was in full swing. The Baron's men knew the party was cover for something darker, an auction of high-priced merchandise – read, people – too valuable to be sold off in lots.

Ciel's comms buzzed with unfamiliar voices. The Baron's team were scattered around outside with him, preparing to sneak in at various points simultaneously; Ciel was just onsite to provide an additional lookout and any last-minute information he might suddenly remember about the last time he snuck in. (Yeah … right.) Their plan was to infiltrate, observe, and eliminate anyone participating in the auction, taking out all the high bidders and Aleistor himself to stop this trafficking ring cold.

A stickler for rules, Sebastian naturally objected to the use of lethal force, arguing that the criminals deserved a fair trial and prison not summary execution. Ciel, naturally, reminded him that this was real life and not a Batman movie where the Joker would be sent to Arkham for two days and allowed to escape and stir up trouble again. "You're dealing with a foreign country's Secret Intelligence Service. Your government doesn't even know we're here and we don't have to play by their rules. Hell, in reality, we don't even play by our own rules. Welcome to the life of a spy!" Sebastian had just frowned, not at all happy about what Ciel was doing or the fact that he was being left behind.

" _Phantom!_ " a strange voice said into his helmet.

"Copy!" he blurted. "I had some static. Please repeat."

" _Is it clear on your end?_ "

Ciel scanned the area around him again. "All clear."

" _Roger._ " The stranger proceeded to direct the first wave in. They would filter through the house, taking note of who was in attendance and trying to locate the auction. Chances were the people dancing happily in the ballroom had no idea what was really going on, they were just cover for the criminals. The real targets would be cloistered away in a dark office or basement, quietly conducting business while dozens of happy people talked about what a great party it was, blissfully ignorant of the horrible fate befalling their fellow man in the next room.

Ciel kept his eyes peeled, silently scanning the grounds as he listened to the soft chatter through his earpiece. A chorus of " _Clear_ " seemed to be playing on repeat as the Baron's team swept the upper floors. The longer it went on, the tenser he got, knowing the shooting would start any second now. Finally, a voice noted, " _Floors one and two clear. Only the basement left._ " Ciel's hand tightened on his tree branch. Despite what he said to Sebastian earlier, he really hated violence and was glad he didn't have to go in there with them. He was perfectly capable of doing it, of course. He'd had the proper training and could shoot with the best of them; he just preferred not to.

Multiple voices started shouting, ordering people to the ground. A few shots were fired, muffled small calibers that probably couldn't be heard through the floor and music above. Ciel tried to tune out the grunts of pain and demands for information. One voice in particular did catch his attention, though. It was musical and flamboyant and for a second he mistook it for Redmond's, though he realized his error as the conversation went on. It was much calmer and a touch deeper. This wasn't Edgar Redmond; it was his uncle, Aleistor Chamber. _Small world indeed_ , Ciel thought to himself.

_Smack. "Just tell us and we'll stop."_

_A broken cackle. "This is exactly what I'd expect from Kelvin."_

_Thump. "Where is the rest of your stock, Aleistor?"_

_"He would like to know, wouldn't he?" A wet cough. "Never was afraid of getting his hands dirty."_

_A quiet shot followed by a scream. "Next one goes in your pretty face."_

_"Do it," Aleistor said proudly. "I'm sure he'd reward you for taking out the competition." Smack, thump. More pained laughter. "He can kill me, but he'll never be better than me. The Bloody Baron with his twisted love of children. That fool will never realize his sick obsession is holding him back." A tortured scream. "Just kill me! I know you're going to. My little robins are all adults, useless to him." Pause. Boom._

Ciel's fingers were numb from how hard he gripped the tree. If he weren't wearing gloves, blood would undoubtedly be running down his arm from the bark digging in. Kelvin was a slave trader? That didn't make any sense. Ciel breathed fast and shallow, nearing hyperventilation.

A new comm crackled to life. " _Father, we have disposed of them._ "

" _Yes, I heard_ ," the disturbingly light voice of the Baron spoke, making Ciel jump. " _One of_ y _ou left the line open_ ," he added with a note of disapproval. " _Just leave them where they fell and head back to Home Base. I'm sure some of us will need to talk about this_."

Nervous prickles ran up and down his spine. The Baron was talking about him, wasn't he? Ciel bolted, running blindly into the forest surrounding the mansion.

" _Phantom,_ " that light voice chided with an amused chuckle. " _Are you running away?_ "

 _Fuck, my GPS!_ Ciel didn't stop, though.

" _Come now, let's talk about this like reasonable people. Just come back home and Father will explain everything._ "

"What's there to talk about? You're either a slave trader or you're not."

The Baron _tsked_ at him. " _That kind of black and white thinking will get you nowhere. The most beautiful roses have thorns; it's part of their allure._ "

A pop sounded in his ear, followed by a female voice. " _Ciel!_ "

"Lizzy!?" He stumbled a step at her unexpected voice before righting himself and continuing his escape. Lizzy and Snake weren't supposed to be working tonight, but somehow it didn't surprise him that they had been listening in anyway.

" _I've switched your comm frequency. Snake's rerouting your GPS. Can you make it to old D.P. Five from where you are?_ "

"Do I have a choice?" he asked, really not looking forward to that far of a hike through the woods back to the edge of town.

" _Not really_. _Don't go in when you get there. Walk two blocks past it and we'll be waiting in the alley._ "

" _Not to be paranoid, but you should probably ditch the helmet before you get much further_ ," Snake interjected. " _It won't take their guys long to realize what we're doing and regain access_."

"Right. Taking it off now, see you in an hour." Ciel pulled it off reluctantly and hurled it far off to the left, feeling a twinge of remorse. He had lots of good memories with that thing. It even saved him from a bullet, which made it an honorary member of the team as far as Ciel was concerned. He sighed, on his own in more ways than one now. No helmet, no comms, no boss. Nothing but him and the woods and an uncomfortably long, silent jog with nothing to do but think.

Ciel set a comfortable pace, jogging lightly over the mostly flat terrain and paying close attention to his footing so he wouldn't trip or twist an ankle.

His mind skipped right over the question of whether or not Kelvin was a human trafficker. The man had all but admitted it himself. From the line of questioning he had heard tonight through his comms, it was clear the Baron's personal team knew as well. This left the only real question: Was Kelvin actually part of the Secret Intelligence Service? Ciel's stomach was a cold pit of dread at the thought.

On one hand, Kelvin could just be a corrupt cog, using his position to further his own off-the-books activities. On the other, he may never have been official to begin with. There was a third option: that the British government itself was involved and this was a legitimate operation, but Ciel dismissed that thought as soon as it surfaced. No, using Occam's Razor Kelvin was either a SIS operative who was secretly a slave trader or a slave trader lying about being SIS. Neither was a comforting thought.

The Baron had recruited Ciel, Lizzy, and Snake six years ago. All three had been orphans, recently kicked out of state homes due to their age and looking for work. None of them had known the others until they were teamed up during training. Ciel had honestly thought the job offer was a joke at first. Seriously, do all government intelligence agencies just walk up to random kids and ask if they'd like to be a spy? He'd gone along with it just to see how long the joke would last, but to his surprise, it turned out to be serious. They taught him how to pick locks, bypass security systems and handle firearms. The tasks got increasingly difficult and demanding as he went on until one day he realized they were for real. He was _really_ doing this! He excelled at the delicate tasks and was ecstatic when he was given his first mission. After doing small jobs around the home country, they were assigned to their first long-term, deep cover job here in the States.

Ciel had been excited to finally do something meaningful, something good. He was going to help rescue kidnapped British citizens. Instead of piddling around with pretty crimes, he was going to stop bad people from doing seriously bad things all over the world. Looking back on it, Ciel couldn't help but laugh at himself. Maybe he and the Demon Crow weren't so different after all.

His chest hurt at the thought that it was all a lie. Ciel really hoped Kelvin was a corrupt agent rather than an out-and-out phony. It wasn't much better, but he couldn't bear the thought that he'd been aiding and abetting an abject criminal this whole time, that everything he thought he'd been doing for his country had actually just been to further a monster's sick personal goals.

The trees started thinning and he let his pace slow a bit. His side ached where he had been shot a few weeks ago and he pressed a hand to it, scanning the edge of the city he could see through the trees. He adjusted his course south, keeping hidden as long as possible. While he had been running, the Baron's team had likely returned to their vehicles and driven. If they were able to guess his destination, Ciel estimated that they would arrive at approximately the same time he did. He had the advantage of going five miles in a straight line while they had to follow the large, winding loop of roads; however, they clearly had the advantage of speed. And not having been recently injured.

Lip curled in irritation at everyone and everything, Ciel made his way to the point that would give him the straightest run to his destination. He didn't _see_ anything suspicious between him and his goal, but that meant nothing. He took a few deep breaths, bouncing in place before flat out sprinting as fast as he could into the city. It was near midnight and he was barely skimming the edge of civilization, so there were no pedestrians and he couldn't even hear cars from his location. He ran straight down the middle of the street, not bothering with curbs and crosswalks and all that pedestrian foolishness like walking around trash bins. He pushed himself hard and fast, wishing he still had his helmet so he could talk to the others. Oh well, he'd see them soon enough.

Ciel blew through the intersection with the street DP5 was down, running full speed into the agreed upon alley and hoping the Baron's men (if they were even staking out DP5) didn't see the brief flash of him. He pulled back on his heels, skidding to an ungraceful stop and flopping onto the hood of an unfamiliar black car, panting.

"Smooth," Snake noted from the passenger seat.

"Get in!" Lizzy cried from the driver's seat.

Ciel rolled himself around the side of the vehicle and climbed into the back. As soon as his door closed, the car lurched forward silently, crossing the intersection quickly. _Huh, an electric car. Weird._ Lizzy zipped down a few more streets soundlessly, making a beeline to the interstate. "Where are we going?"

"Somewhere safe," Elizabeth responded shortly. Ciel nodded, trusting her. They obviously couldn't go back to any of their houses or usual bases with the Baron's men searching for them. Well, searching for _him_ , really, but it wouldn't be long before his team was targeted as well when they didn't respond to official summons. It wouldn't take an intelligence agent to figure out they were siding with Ciel over the Baron.

The three rode in silence, not needing words. Obviously none of them had prior knowledge of the Baron's activity and all were not okay with it, otherwise they wouldn't be in this (likely stolen) car right now. Words wouldn't help; what they needed was action. Ciel glared out the window, watching unfamiliar buildings fly by. Lizzy stared intently at the road, knuckles white as she gripped the wheel. Snake frowned down at this lap, lost in thought.

The car moved off the interstate, flowing into regular traffic. The streets were wide and clean with bright lights and a nice sidewalk. Lizzy drove them past nice little shopping centers and neighborhoods, eventually turning into one labeled "Greenwich." Ciel was now officially curious, but made himself wait patiently. He would find out soon enough. The unusually somber blonde guided the car deep into the subdivision and down the driveway of what he could only described as a castle. Ciel's eyes widened as she parked behind it, hidden from the road. Yeah, that was the last straw. Curiosity officially won out over patience. "Where are we?" Ciel demanded, staring up at the imposing stone structure.

"My friend's house. Come on," she called, climbing out. Snake followed suit immediately, looking unfazed, but he was never fazed by anything. Not really having a choice in the matter, Ciel joined them at a big wooden door. Lizzy pressed a buzzer marked **DELIVERY** and the door was immediately opened by an imposing middle-aged blond man with truly impressive muttonchops. Lizzy mustered up the smallest of smiles, greeting him with "Hey Wolfram" as she pushed past. Snake and Ciel nodded politely, eyeing the large man curiously. "Come on guys, this way." Lizzy led them down a wide, ground-floor hallway to a bedroom where a teenage girl was chatting animatedly.

"Oh, good! You're here!" the girl shouted with a faint German accent upon spying Lizzy. She was dainty like a doll, with glass green eyes and glossy brown-black hair. She was also perched neatly in a little wheelchair. "I really should be mad at you for inviting yourself over like this – and with so many people!" Her eyes scanned the group, delicate face taking on a sly cast as she added, "But I can't object to having this many attractive men in my bedroom! Good lord! No wonder you never introduced me. Afraid I'll steal your harem?" Her eyes twinkled.

Before Ciel could even demand an explanation, he was snatched off his feet and crushed to a familiar-smelling chest. "S-sebastian!?" His eyes practically popped out of his sockets. How the hell had he forgotten about Sebastian? He wrapped his arms around the larger man, immensely grateful that his team had thought to relocate him. Kelvin may not know that Sebastian is the Demon Crow or his boyfriend, but he was Ciel's roommate and thus an extremely likely target to have been hurt in Kelvin's search for him. Ciel's ears burned with shame at having forgotten his boyfriend, arms wrapped around Sebastian's broad chest.

"Think they'll make a sandwich with me?" the brunette purred hopefully.

"Sieglinde!"

"What? They're hot," she said, completely unashamed.

Ciel flinched at the unfamiliar girl's voice. He turned his head to glare, not letting go of Sebastian. "Who are you?" he demanded bluntly.

"Don't take that tone with me, shrimp," she warned.

"Don't call me a shrimp, hag."

"Don't call me a hag – !"

"Cool it!" Lizzy interrupted before things could spiral out of control. "This is precisely why I never introduced you two," she informed Sieglinde. "You're exactly the same." Both Ciel and Sieglinde sniffed, looking away from each other at that. "Ciel, this is my friend Sieglinde Sullivan. Sieglinde, this is my team captain, Ciel Phantomhive."

"Lizzy!" he shouted at that, finally pulling free of Sebastian. "You _told_ her!?"

"Cool your jets, toots, she didn't tell me shit until two hours ago," Sieglinde interjected. "We're internet friends."

Lizzy nodded. "Sieglinde is a hacktivist. She's helped me on cases before."

"Not that I knew what she was up to; I just helped her break some low-level encryptions every now and then. I didn't learn about any of this," she made an all-encompassing gesture, "until tonight."

"We've hung out in person a few times, but mostly we just talk online."

Ciel blinked at the way the two females practically finished each other's sentences. "I … didn't know you had friends," he said slowly, as if it were a completely foreign concept.

Lizzy squeaked indignantly. "Of course I have friends! Everyone has friends – everyone except _you_ does, apparently." Ciel made an unattractive face at her. "Anyway, once I told her what was happening, Sieglinde offered to let us crash here for a few days until we figure things out."

"I might even help you renegades out. Down with government corruption, yo."

Ciel eyed her, but didn't argue. Beggars can't be choosers. If Lizzy trusted this girl, that would have to be good enough for him … a decision that was almost immediately reconsidered when he caught sight of the way she was ogling his ass. "Hey! A little decency, please? I'm not a slab of meat."

The teen flicked her eyes to his face and immediately back to his butt. "Huh-uh. If you want decency, you're gonna have to change out of that skin-tight yum-yum suit."

Ciel's face burned a mortified red. "Oh, god," he moaned into Sebastian's chest. " _Please_ tell me you brought me a change of clothes?" He could feel Sieglinde's hot gaze burning a hole through his suit.

"I did," Sebastian's chest rumbled under his ear, "but it won't help. I get the feeling Miss Sullivan is going to look at you no matter what you wear."

"Ya got that right, toots." Sieglinde wiggled her eyebrows at Ciel's back, making Sebastian smile. The taller man handed him an armful of clothes and ushered him into a bathroom to change. Ciel pulled on the soft sweats quickly, padding back out barefoot to find the others fanned out in a semi-circle across Sieglinde's room. Sebastian and Snake sat on opposite corners of her large bed, Lizzy in a plush dressing chair by Snake, and Sieglinde in her wheelchair on the other side of Lizzy. Sebastian snatched Ciel up as soon as he drew near enough and pulled him into his lap on the bed; Ciel immediately bit his arm and crawled off, not in the mood for touchy-feely. It was their relationship in a nutshell, really.

"So, what are you going to do?" Sieglinde asked abruptly, shattering the silence. The team exchanged glances, obviously lost. "Come on, people. You're not living in my house forever. Tell me you have a plan."

"We could … call another city's super hero?" Sebastian suggested, lifting a hand. "Maybe someone with powers?"

"Or the Demon Crow!" Sieglinde added excitedly. "I bet he could handle it."

Ciel snorted. "No."

"What's wrong with the Crow?"

"He's a moron," Ciel answered, making Snake and Lizzy snicker. Sebastian pouted at Ciel who was having none of it.

"Says who? He sure seems to accomplish a lot even without powers. Did you see how he stopped that armed robbery last month? And that booty is _fine_." Sebastian smirked at Sieglinde's words.

Ciel rolled his eyes. "Please stop. If his ego gets any bigger, it will explode."

"It's not ego if he deserves it. Don't tell me you're one of those old fuddy-duddy Crow haters?"

Ciel looked between Lizzy and Sieglinde, curious why she hadn't shared Sebastian's alter ego. Lizzy shrugged almost imperceptively as if to say _Not my secret_. He was debating how to respond when Sebastian looped and arm around him – freaking _again­_ – and pulled him close. Ciel tolerated it this time because Sebastian left him on his feet. "He most definitely is _not_ a Crow hater."

"Then why –" Sieglinde's eyes went wide as she met Sebastian's taunting red gaze. "No. No way!" Ciel threw his head back and groaned, staring at the ceiling as Sieglinde fangirled. Why did everyone love the bloody Crow so much anyway? A particularly piercing screech broke through his internal grumbling, making him wince.

"Um," Snake's soft voice called out, somehow cutting the loud chatter like a knife. Sieglinde was probably just surprised to hear him speak. Hell, Ciel knew he was himself most of the time. Snake was never a big talker, so Ciel always listened when he bothered to say something. It didn't hurt that the white-haired man was probably smarter than both him and Lizzy put together (a fact Ciel would never utter aloud for the sake of his own pride).

"Finally, the voice of reason has arrived," Ciel noted. "Snake, what's your idea?"

"I say we hide," the albino said simply.

"We _are_ hiding," Ciel pointed out. "What should we do next?"

"Keep hiding."

Ciel eyed him skeptically, trying to decide if there was some deeper meaning to those words he wasn't picking up on. "You mean, just … hide? And stay hidden? Forever?" Snake nodded, golden eyes serious. "Yeah, no. We're not just going to walk away from this."

"Ciel –" Lizzy started.

"Lizzy, we can't. This is our fault. We did this. Knowingly or not, we've been complicit in human trafficking for _years_. Everything we've done, every job we've completed has helped that monster hurt people. No – not just people, _children._ There's blood on our hands. We can't hide and we can't run away. We are going to clean up our own mess." Lizzy's green eyes widened, then her face hardened and she nodded. Sebastian put an encouraging hand on Ciel's shoulder and Snake stared at him levelly, clearly disagreeing. After a second, Ciel continued, "I'm afraid that brings us back to square one: what are we going to do now?"

Lizzy shook her head. "I don't know. I'm onboard for whatever you guys decide, though."

"I know I'm not a member of Team Watchdog or whatever," Sieglinde said, "but why don't you guys call the real British CIA?"

Before Ciel could let fly an undoubtedly scathing response, Lizzy butted in with, "It's SIS, and they don't have jurisdiction here."

Sieglinde lifted a dainty brow. "But you guys were here."

"That's because our entire lives were a lie, alright?" Ciel bristled. "Thanks for rubbing it in."

Sieglinde threw hands in exasperation, snarling a sarcastic "Well, sor- _ry_."

"Guys!" Lizzy barked. Ciel and Sieglinde looked away from each other like dogs caught fighting. The blonde rubbed a hand over her face, groaning when she glanced at the white china clock on Sieglinde's nightstand to find a time of just past 2 A.M. "Look, it was a hell of a day and we're all tired. Why don't we get some sleep and pick this back up in the morning when we're not cranky and running on fumes?" Snake and Sebastian nodded; Sieglinde and Ciel looked ready to continue fighting, but allowed their friends to pull them off in opposite directions.

Sieglinde's … butler? guardian? … Wolfram came when she called him on the intercom and set up rooms for the boys far, far away from Lizzy and Sieglinde. Ciel and Sebastian were in one with twin beds; Snake got his own smaller room with a single full size mattress. Wolfram gave them dark looks and sharply explained that all doors were to remain open at night, clearly thinking the men would try to sneak into the ladies' rooms for nefarious purposes. His accent was very strong, much thicker than Sieglinde's, and it made him sound intimidating. He loomed over the younger males, demanding compliance through his presence alone.

Still spoiling for a fight, Ciel pointedly grabbed Sebastian's crotch and massaged it, calling the big blond man a dirty pervert for wanting to watch little boys get it on. He must have gotten his point across, because the cranky slab of meat pulled the door closed on his way out without another word. _Point one for me_ , Ciel thought smugly.

"Not that I'm objecting, but I don't think now's the time to start that."

Ciel looked up at Sebastian curiously and then jerked his hand away like it had been scalded. "Sorry. I just wanted him to go away."

Sebastian chuckled, kissing him on the top of the head. "I know. Now let's get some sleep."

Face burning, Ciel nodded. He scurried to the nearest bed, jumping under the covers to hide. He heard rustling as Sebastian undoubtedly stripped before climbing into his own twin bed. Ciel didn't peek out until well after he heard the light click off. One blue eye peered into the dark room, then another. Faint moonlight filtered in through the gauzy curtains, barely enough to let him make out Sebastian's still form on the other bed, undoubtedly sleeping the easy sleep of the innocent. Ciel's brows furrowed at that thought, his earlier embarrassment melting away in the calm silence of the room.

Ciel cured up on his side, feeling strangely empty. He clutched the blankets to his chest, but it didn't fill the aching void that had formed that day. He thought of all the people he had unknowingly hurt while working for Kelvin and felt dirty. He gasped out a quiet, shaky breath, eyes squeezed shut. _It's all my fault. I should have been smarter!_

"Ciel?"

Ciel rolled over and buried his face in his pillow, refusing to respond. His small bed dipped as a large body crawled under his covers, a strong arm wrapping around his waist as Sebastian curled up against his back.

"Shh, it's alright. It'll be okay."

Ciel fought to stay perfectly silent and still, not wanting to talk about it. He listened to Sebastian murmur soothing nonsense into his ear until he drifted off.

Morning came too soon. Ciel stubbornly kept his eyes closed, willing himself back to sleep. He didn't want to get up and he especially didn't want to think. Something had clicked in his head overnight and this whole situation was starting to piss him off.

As he lay there, telling himself he was definitely _not_ thinking, Ciel decided that he refused to feel bad for himself. _Refused_. This entire mess was Kelvin's fault; Kelvin did this to him and all the others. Royal blue eyes snapped open, glaring hard at the white wall next to his bed. It was amazing how a night's worth of sleep could change a person's perspective. No longer exhausted and confused, Ciel's belly burned at how Kelvin had lied to him, to all of them. He had tricked them into becoming his accomplices and dirtied them with his own sick perversions. Ciel could have gone to college, could have gotten a real job and had a real life, but all that was taken away – by _Kelvin._ He thought the name with venom, eyes narrowed in single-minded determination. The man had sullied him and Ciel would exact his revenge if it was the last thing he did.

Without moving, he turned his senses to the room behind him. Hearing nothing, he peeked over his shoulder and found it empty. Ciel blinked a few times, surprised that Sebastian had left without waking him. There was no noise from the hall, but that wasn't unexpected as Wolfram had put them excessively far away from the girls and main center of the house. Ciel sniffed his shirt, deemed it good enough, and rooted around in Sebastian's black duffle bag until he found a pair of his own shoes, thankful his boyfriend had thought to pack them.

He made his way back down the hall, assuming he'd run into someone sooner or later. His intuition did not disappoint; he heard voices off to one side and followed them to find Lizzy, Sebastian, and Sieglinde in a dining room of sorts. A breakfast buffet of fruit and cold cuts sat near the table.

"Hey Sleeping Beauty," Sieglinde called from the far end of the table. Ciel grumbled something rude, shuffling over to Sebastian and plopping down in the next open chair. The teen rolled her eyes, saying in a sarcastically high and chipper voice, "Good morning, Sieglinde. Thank you so much for letting us stay in your pretty house and eat your delicious food _._ "

"We really are grateful!" Lizzy cried.

Sieglinde smirked, patting her hand. "I know you are, sweetie. It's grouchy pants down there who could use some manners."

Ciel ignored her, asking: "Where's Snake?"

Sieglinde shrugged, sipping her coffee. Lizzy shook her head unknowingly. "He left early to take care of some things," Sebastian said.

" _What?_ " Ciel spat. "What the hell was he thinking? The Baron's men are probably crawling all over the city right now, waiting for one of us to show up. Why didn't you stop him?"

Sebastian raised his hands in surrender. "I don't know! The little guy was adamant about it. I would have had to sit on him to make him stay." Ciel gave him a dirty look, clearly thinking that's exactly what he should have done.

"Snake'll be fine!" Lizzy said. "He always is." Ciel gave her a slightly less dirty look because he had to agree with her. Snake was a slippery sucker. Ciel often wondered why _he_ wasn't the Phantom, but the pale man simply refused to go into the field any more than absolutely necessary.

"Think you can get me a plate without messing anything up?" Ciel grumbled in Sebastian's general direction. Knowing the smaller man wouldn't have bothered speaking to him if he were truly mad, Sebastian nodded and rose to comply.

Sieglinde lifted a brow. "Oh, so that's how it is. You like being talked down to, big boy?"

" _Sieglinde!_ " Lizzy hissed, mortified.

"What? Gotta let him know the option is open," she said with a wink, completely unabashed.

"Now who needs manners?" Ciel muttered.

Sieglinde bristled, but Sebastian jumped in before the two could start needling each other. "Anyway! Now that we've all slept and most of us have eaten," he sat Ciel's tea and plate down in front of him to occupy the smaller man, "aren't we supposed to come up with a plan?" Ciel bit into a croissant, glaring in silence as he chewed.

"That's right!" Lizzy chipped in before Sieglinde or Ciel could say anything. "I was thinking that we might be able to hack their system and turn their files over to the real police. It wouldn't be too hard because it's the same system we've been using while working for them, right?"

"Wouldn't they have, I don't know, thought of that?" Ciel said. "I mean, these _are_ the people who trained us. They know that's the first thing we'd try because it's the easiest."

Sieglinde grimaced, clearly agreeing with Ciel and not liking it. After a tense moment of silence she had to say, "Yeah, Liz. They've probably changed everything, or at the very least wiped it. I wouldn't trust anything you get off their system now." At her dejected face, Sieglinde offered, "But I'll help you do it after breakfast if you want. They could have slipped up."

Lizzy nodded, a little put out. "Thanks. You guys are probably right, but it's still worth a shot."

"Sebastian?" Ciel prompted.

The man in question pressed a pensive finger to his chin and crossed his legs, looking up at the ceiling and humming pensively. He was the very picture of deep thought. Ciel had to bite his lip at the overly dramatic gesture. _Looks like someone is in a much better mood today if he is able to go full Demon Crow drama llama._ With an excited a-ha and raised finger that made Ciel groan, Sebastian threw out the stupidest suggestion he could come up with: "We'll take the fight to them. You know where their base is right? Why don't we all suit up and go in guns a-blazing?"

Ciel stared at him, seriously considering the idea that his boyfriend might be full on, batshit-crazy. "Is that seriously your solution to everything? Just show up and start swinging?"

Sebastian tilted his head side to side as he thought. "Well, it has worked out for me on everything so far, so yes."

"I honestly can't tell if you're lucky or insane."

"Does it matter?"

"Uh, yeah, kinda, because I'm neither. Need I remind you that I'm a bullet magnet?"

Sebastian's face fell a bit at that. "Right. Sorry."

Sieglinde looked around. "Okay, so you can't hack them remotely and you can't attack them head on; what's left?" The others looked at her silently, making her sigh in exasperation. "Come on, people. Work with me here."

"Um, something sneaky?" Lizzy guessed.

"Bingo, toots. You're _spies_ aren't you? Start acting like it."

"One problem, though," Ciel countered, "we're not the planners. We only carry out the missions H.Q. sends to us."

"That's not true," Sebastian pointed out. "I just watched the three of you come up with the most perfect infiltration plan for a place that even your 'H.Q.' couldn't breach. Isn't that why your boss came to the States in the first place, to lead a mission using your plan?"

Lizzy perked up. "Yeah, that _is_ right!"

Even Ciel smiled a little bit. "Okay," he admitted. "We _might_ be able to pull this off, but we're definitely going to need Snake."

While the others chatted happily, bouncing increasingly silly ideas around as they waited for the last member of their team to arrive, Ciel stared out the window and amused himself by deciding precisely what kind of revenge he would enjoy the most. Picturing the Baron's doughy round face, he smiled fiercely. _I'm coming for you._


	7. Chapter 7

As expected, Snake was able to help them whip their disjointed ideas into a plan in no time. This was considerably easier than planning for Aleistor's mansion because the Baron _wanted_ them to come in. The tricky part was doing it in such a way that they could get back out again.

Ciel was honestly impressed with his team. Lizzy had fantastically creative ideas. He tempered her enthusiasm with his own practicality. Snake balanced the two, boiling their concepts down into workable actions. Even Sebastian and Sieglinde helped, throwing in their outsider perspectives and bringing up off-the-wall suggestions never mentioned in "real" spy training classes. Individually they were all kind of useless but together they formed a cohesive, functioning unit. For the first time, Ciel actually felt lucky to have them by his side – even the stupid Demon Crow, who made surprisingly good tea.

Sebastian and Snake huddled in one corner of the drawing room during the afternoon, chatting quietly as they worked together to make Ciel a new helmet and tinker with his suit. Ciel took it upon himself to oversee Lizzy and Sieglinde in the office, feeling mildly useless because his part in the plan wouldn't come until much later. The two females clacked happily on their keyboards as he wandered around them awkwardly.

"Sit down, shrimp. You're making me anxious," Sieglinde commanded in her crisp accent, not looking up from her screen.

Ciel bristled but didn't snap back. He flopped down into a chair, crossing his arms and scowling petulantly. He didn't want to wait; he wanted to kick Kelvin's ass _now_. Obviously, beating the dirty old man until he felt better was not part of the official plan, but Ciel was sure he could find a way to tack it on.

The others were content with their plan of keeping Kelvin busy by dangling Ciel in front of him so that Lizzy and Snake, whom the Baron would never expect to enter the field, could sneak in and steal the unaltered files (real or electronic) they needed to turn over to the authorities. They wanted to play things by the book – well, as by the book as fake spies stealing from other fake spies could be – and let a real government capture, try, and convict Kelvin and his men. Ciel had voted to wipe the world clean of Kelvin (it was what he deserved, after all), but was unanimously outvoted.

Snake said Kelvin was holed up at Home Base. Ciel didn't know how he came to that conclusion having been cloistered away with the rest of them in Sieglinde's mini-castle, but Ciel had to admit it was a likely conclusion. Kelvin undoubtedly wanted his runaway team to come back and was counting on them being able to find him. Ciel wasn't sure what he hoped to accomplish, maybe convincing them to join him like the other agents who went to Chamber's mansion last night? Or maybe he just wanted to dispose of them now that they knew the truth. If he expected The Queen's Watchdog to fall in line with something so vile, he had another thing coming. Ciel kicked his toe angrily at the ground, itching to put his foot in Kelvin's face.

"What are you, twelve? Sit still already," Sieglinde snapped, her tinge of German more pronounced when angry.

"I can't! I just want to get on with it. And what does that make you, six?"

"I'm eighteen! How the hell old are you, anyway, tiny-tot?"

"Twenty-fucking-mind-your-own-business, bitch."

Sieglinde let out an unladylike snort. "I like you. You've got fire."

Some of the tension dropped from Ciel's shoulders. Lizzy, who looked like she'd inhaled a bug during their volley, relaxed too. Seeing her parental intervention wasn't needed, she turned back to work, letting the other two handle themselves. Ciel's lip quirked. "Thanks. And sorry. I'm twenty-four."

Sieglinde nodded, sticking a sucker in her mouth and sliding her eyes back to her screen. "So you're all the same age, huh? Cool."

"I don't know about Sebastian, but the rest of us, yeah. We all got recruited at eighteen." He eyed her suddenly. "Hey, why aren't you in school?"

She shrugged. "What for? I went to high school."

"Um, so you can get a job and have a career maybe? You're really good with computers."

Sieglinde looked pointedly around. "Does it look like I need money to you? Why would I waste my time taking classes I already know all the information in to get a job I don't want to make money I don't need?"

"Fair enough. But doesn't sitting around all the time get boring?"

She rolled her eyes and spun her wheelchair around in a circle. "Gee, does sitting get boring? I wouldn't know."

Ciel's face flushed. "Er, sorry. Poor choice of words. You know what I mean, though."

Sieglinde laughed at his distress. "I'm just messing with you. And no, it doesn't because I've always got things going on. I'm a social justice warrior, writing the wrongs of Big Business and fighting government corruption one hack at a time."

Ciel nodded. Before yesterday, he would have snapped at her to let the real authorities handle that sort of problem. However, his own situation being what it now was, a large part of him wanted to pat her on the back for doing what was right no matter how she went about it. Funny how quickly perspective could change.

"Anyway, it's almost time. Why don't you go see if the boys are done working on your sexy booty pants?" She probably just wanted to get rid of his distracting fidgeting, but Ciel nodded anyway. It's not like he was doing any good in here.

He found Sebastian and Snake right where he left them. Snake was staring right at him the moment Ciel rounded the corner. "Phantom. Sieglinde has good timing. Sebastian says he just finished your new helmet."

Sebastian extended the helmet in question. It was a clunky motorcycle-based helmet, not nearly as sleek and streamlined as his old one, but not bad. "Try her on and let's see how she works."

Ciel took it without hesitation and slipped it on. "She?"

"Work this beautiful is definitely a lady," Sebastian stated, leaving no room for argument.

 _Whatever. Weirdo._ As long as it worked, Ciel didn't care what Sebastian called it. "Fits okay. Is it working, Snake?"

The other man typed on a tablet. "Yep. Got audio and visual. We didn't put a GPS in it –"

"Her."

"– her just to be safe. It shouldn't be a big deal though as we'll all be close."

"Not as close as some of us would like," Sebastian grumbled in a faux whisper clearly intended to carry.

Ciel narrowed his eyes, then took off the helmet so Sebastian could see that he had narrowed his eyes. "If you don't like being in charge of the getaway car, we can tie you up and lock you in the basement right here and now. There's no way in hell the Demon Crow is coming out tonight."

Sebastian looked at him pleadingly, earning a head shake for his trouble. "I swear I'll do everything you say," he wheedled.

Ciel arched a brow. "Deal," he said immediately.

"Really?" Sebastian eyed him skeptically, clearly not having expected that to work. Snake snickered harder than the situation warranted.

"Yep. The Demon Crow can come along so long as you do everything I say. And I say you sit your ass in that car and don't even think about following me in. If you step so much as a toe out, I _will_ shoot you and lock you in the trunk until we're done. Now gimmie my damn suit so I can get changed." Torn halfway between sulking and smiling, Sebastian handed the suit over without resistance. Ciel accepted it with a mock bow, turning on his heel to find a room to change in. When he returned, the others were gathered in the central foyer, preparing to head out.

"I'll be cheering you on from here," Sieglinde told Lizzy earnestly, reaching up for a hug.

The blonde bent down to give her one. "Thank you so much for your help. We'll come back for a visit as soon as possible, won't we guys?"

"Definitely," Sebastian confirmed, placing his own hand on Sieglinde's shoulder. "You're a life saver." Snake nodded in affirmation.

"Don't die, shrimp," she snapped suddenly.

Ciel, who had been hanging near the back because he was terrible with mushy interpersonal shit, jumped at being suddenly addressed. "I'll try not to, hag," he responded with a smile. With that brilliant cultural exchange out of the way, the group grabbed their bags and piled into one of Sieglinde's cars, a spacious black town car. It was a terrible choice for stealth, but fortunately their arrival didn't require any this time.

"This is nice," Lizzy noted from the front passenger seat. The others murmured various sounds of agreement. She was silent for a second before saying, "I'm still not sure why Sieglinde couldn't have helped us remotely, though. You know, like I always do when Ciel's in the field?"

"Wouldn't have worked," Snake stated simply.

"I don't understand why though – "

"It's a bit late to think about changing the plan, isn't it?" Sebastian asked.

Lizzy glanced suspiciously between them for a second and looked back at Ciel, who didn't say anything. "Well … I guess," she allowed hesitantly, still clearly unconvinced. Ciel honestly didn't know either but wasn't going to start an argument so close to go time. If Snake said it wouldn't work, it wouldn't work. Ciel was trying this whole new 'trust your team' thing and it was going pretty well so far.

They rode in near-silence, each mentally reviewing his or her job. The only sound was Lizzy occasionally giving Sebastian directions to Home Base, a closed accounting office building on the edge of the residential district. "And pull around the left side, stop half way down. It'll put you in a blind spot. There's no way they can see the car, much less you, without sending someone out in person." They had gone over all this at the house, but it comforted her to say it aloud. He just smiled kindly and patted her knee.

"Ciel, the plan says you're up first," Snake prompted as the car rolled to a stop.

Ciel nodded, pulling his new helmet on. He thumped it a few times to settle it and rolled his neck to get used to the unfamiliar weight. "Right." He leapt out of the car and made his way back to the road before walking straight toward the building from the front. His job was to draw as much attention as possible, pulling men away from their stations and holding the Baron's attention long enough for Lizzy and Snake to do their thing. It was the direct opposite of his usual 'stay unseen' tactic but he was confident he could pull it off.

Ciel was tempted to wave his arms and shout "Hey, fuckos" as he walked up to make sure everyone was looking at him, but decided not to overplay it. They were undoubtedly watching him on the cameras inside. This suspicion was confirmed when two large, armed and armored men stepped out to greet him, the Baron himself following behind. He was dressed nicely in his usual brown suit, doughy body shielded by the Kevlar-clad forms of his guards, pale round face poking over their shoulders like a moon. Ciel stopped a few yards away and stood staring at them as if they were all in some crappy western, arms hanging loosely at his sides.

"Ciel," the Baron called happily, mustached face smiling beatifically.

"Kelvin," Ciel snarled.

"I see that you are still upset and that is completely my fault for not explaining things to you. What you heard yesterday must have confused you. Why don't you come inside so we can talk it over?" Bastard said it with a straight face, too, like a concerned parent who caught a blushing kid with his first nudie magazine.

Ciel glared at the man's patronizing tone (not that it could be seen), but occupying Kelvin and his guards is exactly what he was supposed to do so he nodded.

"Wonderful! Right this way," The Baron gestured to open door behind him.

When Ciel moved to follow, the guards stepped up, blocking his path. Both the Baron and Ciel looked at them. "We need to search him," one explained to Kelvin. "We can't let him close to you with weapons on his person," he other added. Ciel tensed instinctively, then relaxed. They had expected this. He brought his usual .22 and knife anyway on the off chance that Kelvin was actually bonkers enough not to disarm him, but it looks like his luck wouldn't hold that far. Oh, well. Ciel let out an exasperated sigh, grudgingly holding his arms out in a **T** to signal them to get it over with already.

"I'm sorry for this Ciel. I want us all to be on the same side, but we need to take precautions until we finish our talk, okay?" the Baron explained patiently.

 _What kind of fucking four year-old does he think I am?_ Ciel seethed. He didn't respond or move, holding perfectly still so one guard could finish searching him and the other could stop pointing that freaking gun at his chest already. The searcher took his knife and gun. He pulled off Ciel's helmet, examined it, and set it on the ground, running his hands over Ciel a second, third, and fourth time without finding anything before declaring him good. Ciel gave the guard a dirty look and a sarcastic "Thank you" at the all clear, snatching his helmet back up and tucking it under his arm. The Baron smiled apologetically, leading him into the building where many more Kevlar-wrapped people waited, staring at him with wary eyes. Ciel sneered nastily at them behind Kelvin's back to rile them up. By the time they arrived at Kelvin's destination, they had picked up a truly alarming entourage. The older man blinked owlishly at them. Looking at Ciel's innocent face, he asked, "Is all this fuss truly necessary? He's just one unarmed boy."

A few of the people looked sheepish at their boss's words. Ciel was a little slip of a young man after all. Ciel, though, didn't want any of them to wander off back to their posts and make Lizzy and Snake's jobs harder, so he continued to throw them dirty looks. When one brushed past him too closely, he slammed his shoulder into her abdomen as hard as he could, knocking her down and spitting out a gruff, "Watch it!" to really get their blood boiling. If he thought there was an excessive number of guards before, boy was he wrong. Even more seemed to swarm directly out of the drywall, pulling the fallen woman up and pushing Kelvin back protectively.

The Baron tittered, gesturing for everyone to calm down before violence broke out. "Now, now, let's not let emotions get the better of us. Everyone, take two steps back from Ciel." No one moved. The Baron's eyes narrowed, tone hardening to a dangerous point. "Move." The guards grudgingly shifted, leaving Ciel and Kelvin in an open circle, in the center of a big, open office area filled with a dozen or so desks. The two were ringed completely by a double layer of guards who refused to take their eyes away, much less leave. Perfect. Part one of his mission was going swimmingly.

The Baron gestured toward a chair, inviting Ciel to sit. Ciel took his time considering, drawing things out as long as possible before complying. Part two of his mission was to occupy the Baron for as long as possible and he was determined to do that to the fullest, too. And besides, he had some questions he'd like answered. This was too perfect an opportunity to pass up.

Ciel jumped feet first into the question that had been really burning his britches: "Are you even a government agent or is this all fake?"

The Baron was silent for a painfully long moment before sighing. "No. We're not connected to the British government at all," he admitted softly. "That's just a cover to lure in new recruits." Ciel's heart clenched as his worst fear was realized. He stared at the older man, shocked that Kelvin would so freely admit his deception. He had expected a comforting lie or outright denial at least. Seeing Ciel's surprised face, Kelvin smiled, beady brown eyes crinkling behind his little round glasses. "I'm serious. I really do want us all to work together and lying will only alienate you. You're a very skilled agent. You whole team is and I don't want to lose any of you."

"You want us to … work for you?" Ciel asked cautiously. Kelvin nodded. "Doing _what_?"

"Exactly what you have been," the Baron said kindly, spreading his hands wide. "Just continue retrieving information. Nothing has changed."

Ciel felt his jaw fall open but he couldn't help it. "You want us to pretend nothing happened?"

Kelvin smiled. " _Exactly_. Nothing has changed."

Ciel stared at him as if he'd grown a second head. "So, you're not a human trafficker?"

The Baron made a disgusted face, waving his hand as if batting away flies. "Such a distasteful title. I help customers fill their unorthodox demands. It's a necessary role; if I didn't do it, someone else would. By taking care of it myself, I know the product is being properly cared for and carefully sourced."

Ciel wanted to vomit. The madman talked like he was doing a public service or something. "That's revolting."

Kelvin frowned, clearly not expecting Ciel's reaction. "Personal opinions aside, it doesn't affect your job."

"Doesn't affect my job!" Ciel cried. He knew he should remain calm and keep the Baron talking calmly for as long as possible, but he couldn't help it. "Are you insane?"

"Not at all, are you?" He paused to make sure Ciel wouldn't say more before explaining, "You seem to be operating under the misconception that you are a government agent bound by official rules of right and wrong. You are not. You never have been. You have always worked for me. You were trained by my organization, you did the jobs I sent you, and you were payed by me. Nothing has changed."

The baron stared at him in silence, letting the words sink in.

Ciel felt like scum. No, worse than scum: Scum that worked for scum. All this time he had been so proud of is job, walking around with his nose in the air like he was better than everyone else because he was a _real_ secret agent working for a government and stopping bad guys by any means necessary. Yeah, he knew he was breaking laws, but he thought he was doing it with official dispensation, unlike all those other petty crooks and vigilantes. It was as if the defining part of him had been suddenly ripped away and he had no idea how to cope.

Ciel desperately wanted his part of the mission to be over. He couldn't sit here and listen to this garbage any longer. He closed his eyes, imagining what it would be like when he received the signal to run. The power would cut, plunging the windowless room into darkness. The fire alarm would sound and sprinklers would come on, noise and water flooding the room with enough chaos for Ciel to crouch down and make a break for it. All he had to do was make it to the car and he'd be home free.

One of the guards laughed rudely, prompting a few others to snort. Kelvin snapped at them, "Silence, the lot of you!" More gently, he asked Ciel, "I know this is a lot to take in, but you need to make a decision. Are you in or are you out?"

A shudder ran down Ciel's spine at Kelvin's patient tone. What the hell was _wrong_ with this guy? He was acting like a parent waiting for a toddler to finish his temper tantrum, not anything like the criminal mastermind of a human trafficking ring should. Ciel laughed internally at that thought. Like he would know anything about what a criminal mastermind _should_ think. Hell, he didn't even know what to think himself.

"Don't waste your time with that one," a familiar soft voice said, making Ciel's eyes pop open.

" _Snake!?_ " He stared flabbergasted at the albino standing over Kelvin's right shoulder.

The corner of Snake's mouth twisted up in the barest hint of a smile. The baron laughed at what Ciel could only assume was the completely idiotic look of pure shock plastered over his face. "Indeed. Snake has been one of mine from the beginning. I needed someone to keep an eye on you and Lizzy, especially when you migrated across the pond."

It turned out there was a tiny piece of his trust left to break and Ciel felt it shatter at Kelvin's words. Eyes pleading, he looked at Snake. "Snake …"

Snake sighed, ignoring him. "I told you he'd never go along with it. This one doesn't adapt well to change."

Ciel clenched his fists. "You bastard. Where's Lizzy?"

Snake finally met his eyes, staring him down as if trying to convey the information through his eyes alone before rolling them skyward at Ciel's stubborn determination. "Already taken care of, obviously," he responded in the most exasperated tone possible. "For someone who considers himself to be bright, you sure are slow."

Ciel sprang up at the harsh words, ready to fight. The guards around them leapt to attention at his sudden movement. "I'm going to kill you," he seethed.

Snake smoothly drew a standard issue 9mm pistol and pointed it directly at Ciel's chest. "I'd like to see you try. I'm going to make this real easy for you: join or die."

"There's no need for –" Kelvin started.

"You're right, there's not. He's not going to join us but I'm giving him the choice anyway." Snake stared Ciel down hard, enunciating each word slowly: "Join or die. Pick now."

Ciel trembled with fury, hating how the others undoubtedly mistook his tremors for fear. His eyes locked onto a small drop of blood on Snake's cheek and all he could think of was Lizzy. "I'd rather die than work with scum like you," he spat.

Snake shot a brief look at Kelvin. "See?"

Kelvin sank down wearily in his seat, placing his head in a hand so that he didn't have to look. "Very well. Do it."

Two rounds hit Ciel in the middle of his chest, dead center of mass.

There were no last words, no lippy one-liners or villainous dialogues, just bullets. He fell flat on his back, head smacking the floor painfully. Stars danced in his vision and his ears rang; everything felt fuzzy except for the ache at the back of his skull and the trickle of fluid over his torso.

 _So this is what dying is like. Weird._ He honestly thought it would hurt more.

" _Stay down,_ " Snake's voice echoed authoritatively inside his head, " _and keep your eyes shut_."

Snake? Why was Snake inside his head?

" _For once in your damned life, trust someone else and do what I say_."

Ciel would have laughed at the irony if he could have. Trusting someone else was what got him shot in the first place. He should have questioned Snake's plan like Lizzy had. Lizzy …. Maybe she'd be alive now if Ciel had backed her up earlier. Some team they turned out to be. Ciel was perfectly content to keep his eyes shut like the voice in his head said. He so didn't have the energy to psychoanalyze the deeper meaning behind hearing his killer's voice telling him to trust him; he'd obviously snapped. Precious seconds of life left and he used them to go off the deep end. Peachy.

Not moving was easier said than done, though, because all hell seemed to be breaking loose around him. Couldn't a guy die in peace? Ciel huffed, then frowned. It really _didn't_ hurt. He resisted the urge to reach up and feel his chest but did take a deep breath, noting with extreme confusion that everything felt fine. If anything, his pain was fading rather than increasing and his senses were sharpening rather than dulling. Something definitely wasn't kosher here.

" _I mean it Phantom. Just keep your eyes closed for another minute and I'll explain everything,_ " Snake warned as Ciel was about to sit up, startling him into compliance.

 _Snake?_ Ciel thought tentatively. Could it really be Snake talking to him and not some warped delusion from his mind snapping under stress?

" _You really are slow sometimes, I swear,_ " the albino's voice echoed in his skull along with an unmistakable feeling of fond exasperation.

If his eyes had been open, Ciel would have been blinking in mute bafflement. As it was, he just laid perfectly still and let his dumbfounded brain take a break from thinking.

A foot nudged his side many minutes later. "Alright Sleeping Beauty, you can get up now." Snake's voice sounded oddly flat to his ears after hearing it full of emotion in his head. Ciel scrunched his nose as he cracked his eyes open, wincing at the sudden onslaught of bright light. He pulled himself up into a sitting position and looked around. The room was clear except for Snake and some strangers in suits. Snake held out a hand to help him up and Ciel scowled. "You shot me," he accused, not taking the hand.

"Yes, I did." Snake wiggled his fingers encouragingly.

"You _shot_ me!" Ciel ignored the hand, standing on his own.

"But did you die?" Snake asked archly, letting his arm fall to his side.

Ciel touched his chest, pulling back red fingertips. He prodded around the bloody area but didn't feel any holes, just two dents over his sternum plate, the most heavily armored area. He looked up at Snake for an explanation.

"Sebastian and I reinforced it today. We added some fake blood packets and rigged them to pop under pressure."

Ciel stared at him, jaw slack, mind whirring a hundred miles a minute. "You planned this – Sebastian was in on it? – Where's the Baron? – Lizzy –" Disjointed thoughts rolled off his tongue as he clicked the pieces together.

"Lizzy is fine. And yes, this was all part of a bigger plan." Snake regarded him calmly, but his eyes were smiling.

Ciel glowered as he sifted through his thoughts, trying to decide what question to ask first. He eventually settled on the most obvious: "Who _are_ you?"

"I'm just a very special secret agent tasked with bringing down a human trafficking ring," he explained with a smirk.

"So you actually work for _–_ "

"The Circus? Yeah."

"Was Kelvin –"

"No, he was never one of us."

"Did you –"

"Arrest him? Yes."

"How –"

"Do I know what you're going to say? I'm psychic. Yes really. Yes way. Yes, I heard that, too. Now you're just thinking gibberish." Snake laughed.

"So you're a –"

"God no. I'm not a hero _or_ an alien, just a human with an extra sense."

"That's seriously annoying," Ciel grumbled, miffed at being constantly interrupted.

Snake laughed softly. "I agree completely. Now you see why I don't talk much. It's difficult not to jump ahead." Ciel eyed him. "Yes, we are off topic. We got everything we needed to arrest Kelvin last night, but your group got in the way. The real MI6 wouldn't have enough man power for this raid until late in the afternoon and you lot would have been underfoot long before then if I hadn't done everything I could to stall you. Ideally, I would have kept you from coming at all, but you were bound, set, and determined to be here. And also, not to name names, but one of you was decidedly murdery," he added with a pointed look. Ciel stared back challengingly, completely unashamed. "It's not up to me to decide whether he deserves it or not, I'm just here to arrest him. To do that, I had to keep you from killing him."

Ciel nodded. "So this whole double-agent thing was the real reason you didn't want Sieglinde to help?"

"Yes – and also, I didn't know what she was thinking."

"You couldn't read her mind?" Ciel asked incredulously, wondering why the teen was immune.

Snake laughed. "Oh, I could read it alright, I just don't speak German. I'm psychic, not magic."

"Good to know you have limits," Ciel grumbled. He suddenly felt very nervous and tried to remember everything he'd thought in Snake's presence, hoping there was nothing too embarrassing.

The pale man waved him off. "Don't sweat it. Honestly, I've learned to tune most thoughts out as background noise. It's necessary for self-preservation. Believe me when I say you're better off _not_ knowing what people think. Therein lies the road to insanity, my friend."

"Why didn't you just – tell us? About this, you, all of it?"

"Well, I couldn't until last night, could I? And then I was only concerned with keeping you from getting yourselves killed for the next twenty-four hours."

Ciel clenched his jaw. "Yeah, well maybe we wouldn't have come at all if we knew the truth," he argued stubbornly.

"Or maybe you would have snuck out on your own with some half-baked revenge scheme and dragged Lizzy to her death with you?" Snake looked him dead in the eye, daring him to argue. When Ciel opened his mouth, Snake cut him off with, "Don't even bother trying that one. I heard what you were thinking before we made the group plan." Having no rebuttal, Ciel just made a nasty face at him.

"I can't believe you told Sebastian, though. How'd you get him to go along with it?"

"He was firmly on Team Keep Ciel from Dying Unnecessarily, so I filled him in this morning and let him help me with the real plan. He's fine too, by the way."

Ciel nodded, rolling all the new information around in his head. It was a lot to take in. "There's one thing I don't understand, though. Why go through all this trouble? Why not just knock us out or refuse to let us come? What's the deal with this whole passion play?"

"Put simply," a new brown-haired woman said, "to kill you." She was of an imposing height, looking down on both Snake and Ciel, dressed in what could only be termed a suit in the loosest sense of the word. Colors and ruffles and contrasting fabrics rioted around her, making Ciel's eyes hurt. "Nina Hopkins, division leader" she introduced herself, extending a hand Ciel shook automatically. "When you refused to stay out of the way, we decided to make the most of it. The Baron himself watched you die, which means Snake's cover is intact should we ever have need of it again and you are firmly off his radar. Lizzy too. By killing you, Snake set you free."

Ciel's eyes darted between the two before saying, "Not to look a gift horse in the mouth, but aren't you going to, you know, prosecute us for working with a slave trader and breaking like a million international laws?"

Ms. Hopkins smiled. "And how exactly would I prosecute a dead man? I have a room full of witnesses who can testify that they watched you die with their own eyes. The real question is what will you do now that you're a free agent? From what Snake says, you and Miss Midford are both exceptionally skilled. We'd hate to let such talent go to waste."

Ciel stared at her quizzically before the pieces clicked together in his mind. "Are you offering me –"

"– a job? Yes," Snake finished. "How would you like to be a real MI6 agent?"

"Hell yeah!" Ciel cheered.

Ms. Hopkins smiled. "Excellent. Now where is Sebastian Michaelis? I think we could really use a hero of our own. It's time we started giving New York a run for their money."

Ciel's eyes bugged. "You want the Demon Crow?"

"Of course. That man's got style." She nodded emphatically. Ciel shook his head. Why did everyone have to love that moron?

"You're one to talk," Snake muttered out of the side of his mouth, making Ciel jump.

"Oi! What happened to tuning things out?" he snapped, making Snake snicker.

"Ciel!"

Ciel's head snapped up at his name. "Lizzy!" For once he didn't fight her hug, just held her tightly as she wrapped herself around him, sobbing.

"I'm so glad you're okay!" In a rush of words, she told him all about how Snake had pretended to betray and kill her in front of Kelvin's security team. She made it through the whole ordeal without pausing for breath, finally sucking one in before delving deep into her limitless supply of enthusiasm to gush over how cool Snake's ability is. Ciel's gut unclenched as he held her, worry melting away as he listened to her story. He supposed some small part of him hadn't truly trusted Snake until he saw with his own two eyes that Lizzy was alright.

A dark shape caught his attention and he turned to watch Ms. Hopkins talking to Sebastian in the corner. He was still wearing street clothes, but Ciel would bet real money that the big dork had his Demon Crow body suit on under it. He seemed thrilled with whatever the agent was talking about, face lighting up like it was Christmas morning. They exchanged business cards and Ciel flat out refused to wonder what Sebastian had printed on his – he was 99% sure it had something to do with the Demon Crow and the thought of a masked vigilante handing out business cards made Ciel want to scream.

It took the big oaf entirely too long to come hug him. The fact that he was pissed off at having to wait for a hug pissed him off, which pissed him off further and left Snake madly cackling on the far side of the room. Ciel thought a few choice things at him as he buried his nose in Sebastian's neck and clung to the large man, the world fading away around him as he relaxed into the embrace.

"I'm so glad you're not hurt," Sebastian rumbled, making no motion to let the smaller man go any time soon.

"I'm glad you're okay, too," Ciel murmured, face still buried.

"Miss Hopkins wants me to go to London with your team," Sebastian stated, carefully waiting for Ciel's response. The silvery head just nodded, a vague _m'hm_ sound released against his neck. "I don't know if I will though," he drawled teasingly.

That got a response. Ciel's head whipped up to look at Sebastian though he still held him tight. "What do you mean?" he demanded, clearly hurt.

"I think this city needs me," Sebastian responded, keeping his face as straight as possible despite the adorably desperate look Ciel was laying on him.

"Screw the city; I need you!" Ciel exclaimed, squeezing the large man harder. "Please, Sebastian? You can't _leave_ ; you're the best roommate ever." And he really was. He was quiet and tidy and had a schedule perfectly parallel to Ciel's so that they always saw each other. He snooped through Ciel's stuff, kept up with his odd hours, and asked a bunch of questions because he genuinely cared. All those things Ciel thought he couldn't live with, it turns out he really couldn't live without.

"You're the one who's leaving," Sebastian pointed out with a hint of a smile.

Ciel let go and stepped back a pace to look him in the eye. "So come with me. You want to be a hero, right? This is your chance; be a team with me and Lizzy. We'll need a tech guy once Snake goes back to his real job."

Sebastian brought a hand to his chin and eyed Ciel thoughtfully. It reminded Ciel of the afternoon he had reluctantly agreed to Sebastian joining their faux-spy team. Ciel squirmed under the scrutiny. He'd never seen Sebastian serious for so long and it unnerved him. At last, the black-haired man let out a big breath before allowing, "Fine, but with one condition: You become my sidekick and stay by my side until the very end."

Ciel laughed. "No way." At Sebastian's hurt look, he countered, "I'll let you be mine, though."

Crimson eyes widened in shock. Sebastian responded immediately: "Deal."

 

 

* * *

**The End**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And thus ends this silly thing. Thanks for reading!


End file.
